La voluntad de madurar

¿Qué tiene que ver la madurez con su bienestar? Mucho. La madurez viene de diferentes maneras. Hay circunstancias en la vida que nos fuerzan a madurar, experiencias que pasamos una y otra vez que no nos dejan otra opción que aprender de esas lecciones de la vida. Pero más que nada, creo que para poder madurar se necesita tener la voluntad de madurar. Creo que la madurez es esencial para el bienestar porque cuando uno está dispuesto a madurar esto quiere decir que estamos dispuestos a crecer y el crecimiento es parte del bienestar.

El crecimiento nos lleva a ser mejores seres humanos en todos los sentidos. La madurez requiere que uno crezca. Sin la voluntad de madurar, nos podemos estancar y cuando nos estancamos, eventualmente nos vamos a sentir miserable aun si en este momento nos podemos sentir cómodos con cómo están las cosas. Por ejemplo, se requiere madurez para estar en una relación saludable y amorosa. El saber cuales son sus necesidades y lo que quiere, el estar dispuesto a comprometerse con otra persona, el estar dispuesto a dedicarle tiempo a la relación se requiere crecimiento de su parte porque tenía que mirar hacia dentro de usted para saber estas cosas sobre usted. Otro ejemplo es el darse cuenta de que es usted quien realmente es responsible de cuidarse a usted mismo, de cuidar de su salud, de asegurarse de que esté comiendo bien requiere madurez porque esto quiere decir que usted tomó responsabilidad sobre su vida. Para algunos es más fácil darle esta responsabilidad al doctor, es más fácil el darle la responsabilidad a un ser querido de que si usted comió o no. Se requiere un cierto nivel de madurez el tomar la responsabilidad de los errores cometidos y de aprender de ellos.

El proceso de madurez no es fácil porque esto requiere cambios y los cambios se pueden sentir incómodos. Se sienten incómodos porque como seres humanos nos sentimos cómodos con lo usual aun cuando lo usual no está funcionando para uno. Se siente mejor para uno el dejar las cosas cómo están. El único problema con esto es que tarde o temprano la realidad nos da fuerte hasta el punto que no podemos estar en donde estamos.

Es por está razón que una de las cosas que deberíamos de estar dispuesto hacer es de madurar en todos los sentidos todos los días. Nosotros somos el total de lo que hacemos a diario y es por esta razón que deberíamos estar dispuesto a madurar en cada manera. El crecimiento nos lleva al verdadero bienestar.

Usted puede leer el blog en su Kindle haciendo clic en la tienda Amazon Kindle en http://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 y puede escuchar mis pláticas en la red en http://www.blogtalkradio.com.

Beware of Your Needs

Needs are needs and they are to be acknowledged and respected. We all have a need to be loved, to be needed, to feel connected and a part of something, etc and these are all natural needs. Nothing wrong with them, except when we allow our needs to take over and rule our way of thinking, feeling and behaving in ways that compromise our well-being.

This is why I wrote for the title of this post “beware of your needs” because no matter what need it is, that need, if it’s not in check, can take over you and turn you into a person that you are not otherwise. Balance in everything is important and it also important when it comes to your needs.

I think one of the best ways to balance out your needs is by putting as a priority your sense of peace and well-being. When you make your sense of peace and well-being a priority, no matter how much you may want something, you will judge whether it is worth having what you need based on how it makes you feel and whether or not it adds to your life. A perfect example I can think of is when your need is to be in a romantic relationship. That is a normal need to have but when your priority is your sense of peace and well-being, when someone that may seem like a good candidate comes along, you will be a better judge of whether or not this person is worth having in your life because you are not as hungry for that need since something else has a bigger priority. The problem with needs is not the need itself but the intensity of that need. Feeling hungry is normal but when you are starving, even a salty meal tastes yummy although it is not good for you. This is why I suggest that when having a need, offset it by making something else that truly is important like your peace and well-being a priority so you are not as hungry and settle for something unhealthy for you. Just like you would have a snack in between breakfast and lunch so that by the time it is lunchtime you are not starving, there are other ways that you can better handle that need you have and something else needs to be a priority for you to control the intensity of that need. “How can the whole snacking in between meals be compared to needing a romantic relationship?” you may ask and the answer to this is that I think the secret to not being so hungry for a need is to have other things going on that somewhat satisfies that need that you have. For example, cultivating other healthy relationships such as friendships and family can help when it comes to a longing you may have.

There is nothing worse for your sense of well-being than losing your center and balance in life. When you do lose these things, you become someone you are not, you make choices that are not right for you, you settle for situations that are not healthy for you so in essence, you are compromising your well-being. Nothing is worth you compromising your well-being, not even a need.

You can read this blog on your Kindle by clicking on the amazon Kindle store at http://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

The Willingness to Mature

What does maturity have to do with well-being? A lot. Maturity comes in different ways. There are circumstances in life that forces us to mature, experiences that we go through over and over that leaves us with no option but to learn from those lessons of life. But more so, I think in order to mature, there needs to be a willingness to mature. I believe maturity is essential to well-being because when we are willing to mature it means we are willing to grow and growth is part of wellness.

Growth is what leads us to become better human beings on every level. Maturity requires us to grow. Without the willingness to mature, we become stuck and when we are stuck, eventually we will become miserable even if at the moment we may feel comfortable. Maturity does lead us to having the life that we want. For example, it takes maturity to be in a healthy, loving relationship. To know what your needs and wants are, to be willing to commit to another person, to be willing to take time for a relationship takes growth from your part because you had to look within to know these things about yourself. That takes maturity. Another example, to realize that it is ultimately you who is responsible for taking care of yourself, for taking care of your health, for making sure that you eat right takes maturity because it means that you took ownership of your life. For some it is easier to put the responsibility on the doctor for their health, it is easier to make a loved one responsible for whether or not they eat. It takes a certain level of maturity to take ownership of your mistakes and to learn from them.

The process of maturity is not easy because it requires changes and changes can feel quite uncomfortable. It feels uncomfortable because as human beings we feel comfort in the usual stuff even if that means that the usual isn’t working for us. For us it feels better to leave everything as is. The only problem with this is that sooner or later reality will hit us until we can no longer remain where we are.

For this reason, one of the things that we should be willing to do is to mature in every way each day. We are the sum total of what we do on a daily basis and it is for this reason that we should be willing to mature in every way. Growth leads us to true well-being.

You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at http://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

¿Quiere usted realmente lo que dice que quiere?

Todos nosotros queremos mucho de la vida. ¡¿Y quien no?! Todos nosotros queremos éxito financiero, una carrera exitosa, éxito en relaciones amorosas, etc y parece ser que hay muchas cosas que hacemos para poder conseguir todo esto. Hay momentos en donde el no ser exitoso en alcanzar esa meta puede parecer como si estuvieramos haciendo algo mal cuando se supone que todo lo que hacemos está bien. Hay cosas que he analizado sobre nuestro comportamiento que me hace cuestionar ciertas cosas y es por esta razón que le pregunto a usted, ¿quiere usted realmente lo que dice que quiere?

Hay un dicho en español que dice “No es lo mismo llamar al diablo que verlo llegar”. Creo que este dicho explica muy bien la razón por la cual le pregunto “¿quiere usted realmente lo que dice que quiere?”. Hay momentos en donde uno pide ciertas cosas y parece ser que lo queremos tanto pero después de tener esa cosa que queremos, opps, nos damos cuenta de que al fin al cabo no estabamos preparados para lo que queremos o nos damos cuenta de que no queremos lo que decimos que realmente queremos o por alguna razón bloqueamos lo que queremos que llegue a uno.

Cuando usted haga una lista de las cosas que dice que quiere, sea sincero con usted mismo y pregúntese si usted realmente quiere lo que dice. ¿Qué impacto esta persona o cosa tendría en su vida? Pregúntese si realmente está preparado y dispuesto hacer los sacrificios necesarios para poder tener lo que dice que quiere. Usted tiene que ser completamente honesto con usted mismo. Esto aplica a todo en la vida ya sea la perdida de peso, una relación romántica, el tonificar su cuerpo, ese negocio que usted quiere hacer, cualquier cosa. Le voy a dar algunos ejemplos. Si usted quiere realmente perder peso, ¿está dispuesto a enfrentar los obstáculos que le impiden alcanzar su meta (por ejemplo, el sentir que no puede para de comer en exceso, etc.)? ¿Está dispuesto a cambia su dieta? ¿Está dispuesto hacer ejercicios? Si es una relación romántica lo que usted desea, pregúntese y sea sincero con usted mismo, ¿está usted dispuesto sacar el tiempo para el amor? ¿Tendrá esa persona que usted escoja alguna prioridad en su vida o está usted muy ocupado? ¿Si usted conociera la persona adecuada para usted, estaría dispuesto a darle una oportunidad? ¿Está usted creando un espacio físico, mental y emocional para esa otra persona? Si quiere tonificar su cuerpo, ¿está usted dispuesto a disciplinarse a comer cuando tiene que comer y hacer los ejercicios adecuados? ¿Está usted dispuesto a planificar lo que va a comer? Si es un negocio lo que quiere hacer, ¿está usted dispuesto a dedicarle el tiempo y la energía que se requiere para tener un negocio? ¿Está usted dispuesto a seguir con su negocio aun cuando las cosas se ponen difíciles?

En realidad hay muchas cosas en que pensar y es necesario el ser honesto con usted mismo cuando se trata de las cosas que usted dice que realmente quiere. No puede querer algo y después decir que no lo quiere. Cuando este es el caso, entonces usted nunca quiso lo que dijo que quería. Piense bien lo que usted quiere y pregúntese esas preguntas que desafian su manera de pensar porque las respuestas le darán luz para saber lo que usted necesita hacer para tener las cosas que usted dice que quiere y le indicarán si usted está preparado o no para lo que quiere.

No se olvide que puede leer el blog en su Kindle haciendo clic en la tienda Amazon Kindle en http://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 y puede seguir mis pláticas en la red en http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

Do You Really Want What You Say You Want?

We all want so many things in life. Who doesn’t?! We all want financial success, a successful career, success in romantic relationships, etc and it seems like there are many things that we do in order to try to get those things. There are times when not having success at reaching that goal may seem as if we are doing something wrong when everything we are doing is suppose to be right. There are things that I have analyzed about our behavior that makes me question certain things and it is for this reason that I ask you today, do you really want what you say you want?

There is a Spanish saying that says “No es lo mismo llamar al diablo que verlo llegar” which the literal translation is “It is not the same to call the devil than to see him come”. I think this Spanish saying summarizes very well the reason why I ask the question “do you really want what you say you want?”. There are times that we ask for certain things and we seem to want it so much but then when we do get what we want, oppss, we realize we were not ready after all or may have realized that we don’t really want what we say we want or whatever the reason may be that we may be blocking what we want to come to us.

When you make a list of the things that you say that you want, really ask yourself if you really want it. How will this person/thing impact your life? Ask yourself are you really ready and willing to make the sacrifices necessary in order to have what you say you want? You have to be genuinely honest with yourself. This applies to everything in life, whether it be weight loss, a romantic relationship, toning your body, that business you want to build, anything. I will give you examples. If what you really want is weight loss, are you really willing to face your demons that are stopping you from achieving your goal (i.e. if you feel you can’t stop overeating, etc)? Are you really willing to change your diet? Are you willing to incorporate physical fitness into your life? If it’s a romantic relationship that you want, truly ask yourself, are you willing to make time for that new love? Are you willing to dedicate time to that person? Will that person have some priority in your life or are you too preoccupied in your life? If you were to meet the “right one”, would you be willing to give it a chance? Are you creating physical, mental and emotional space for that other person? If you want to tone your body, are you willing to get disciplined to eat when you are supposed to and workout? Are you willing to plan out your meals? If it’s a business that you want to start, are you willing to dedicate the time and energy that it takes to build a business? Are you willing to stick through it even when the going gets tough?

There is truly a lot of inner thinking and being honest with yourself when it comes to the things that you say that you really want. You can’t just want something and then when it comes you chicken out. When this is the case then you never really wanted what you said you wanted. Truly think about what you really want and ask yourself those challenging questions because they will shed some light to you as to what you need to do in order to have the things that you want and it will provide indicators to you as to whether or not you are ready for what you say you want.

Don’t forget to read the blog on your Kindle by clicking at the Amazon Kindle store at http://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

Las clase de gente que usted necesita en su vida

Sólo usted sabe lo que es mejor para usted y sabe la clase de gente que necesita en su vida. Esto es porque cada uno de nosotros somos diferentes y únicos. Sus necesidades van a ser diferentes a los demás, su personalidad es diferente, etc y esta es la razón por la cual usted sabe lo que es mejor para usted y sabe que clase de personas usted necesita en su vida. Sin embargo, hay ciertos tipos de personas que TODOS nosotros necesitamos y esto es esencial para nuestro bienestar. Estas clases de personas son personas que son saludable mental, emocional y espiritualmente (lo cual voy a explicar más sobre esto), personas que se aman a si mismo, personas que se sienten cómodas con quienes son y quienes son genuinamente buena gente.

Usted no necesita personas quienes son psicópatas, quienes son obsesivas, quienes no tienen límites en su comportamiento hacia usted, quienes no se aman a si mismo, quienes son envidiosos porque estos tipos de personas no tienen mucho que ofrecerle. Psicópatas, bueno, estas personas sólo le roban su energía y usted no necesita eso. Las personas que son obsesivas, ellos tienen ciertas ideas sobre usted en relación a ellos que no son saludables para usted. Aquellos quienes no tienen límites en cuanto a su comportamiento hacia usted, bueno, esto por si solo puede ser un tema, pero el no tener límites saludables puede llevar a relaciones no saludables. Aquellos quienes no se aman a si mismo, ellos no tienen la capacidad de amar a los demás de manera saludable (esto también puede ser un tema). Aquellos quienes son envidiosos sólo tienen energía negativa para ofrecerle y ellos tienen problemas que tienen que resolver que usted en eso no los puede ayudar.

¿Por qué estoy escribiendo todo esto? Estoy escribiendo esto porque las personas con quien usted se rodea juegan un papel grande en su bienestar. Nosotros somos seres sociales y como seres sociales necesitamos interactuar con los demás y necesitamos sentir que pertenecemos a una comunidad. Sin embargo, esta necesidad no debería llevarlo a escoger personas quienes le roban su energía, quienes le roban su autoestima, quienes lo hacen sentir equivocado de alguna manera, etc. Todos nosotros somos energía y es por esta razón que usted se quiere asegurar de escoger personas quienes tienen una relación saludable con ellos mismos, quienes son genuinamente buenos. El escoger personas quienes son saludables mental, emocional y espiritualmente es importante para su salud. Cuando una persona es mentalmente saludable, ellos tienen una perspectiva saludable en cuanto a su relación con usted. Por lo tanto, no hay espacio para que esta persona sea posesiva o obsesiva. Cuando alguien es saludable emocionalmente, esa persona se siente tan bien con ellos mismos a pesar de cualquer complejo que pueda tener y cuando ve que alguien tiene una cualidad que él/ella siente que le falta, en vez de sentir envidia, él/ella siente admiración y respeto. Alguien que es saludable espiritualmente siempre está cultivando su espríritu, asegurándose de preocuparse por sus necesidades y no le da esa responsabilidad a otra persona.

Hay muchos factores que pueden contribuir a una persona que se sienta que su vida está fuera de balance y creo que esto sea uno de los muchos factores. La decisión es suya de escoger personas saludables para usted. Asegúrese de escoger personas que se aman a si mismo. Asegúrese de escoger personas con límites saludables. Asegúrese de escoger personas quienes son saludables mental, emocional y espiritualmente. Su bienestar depende de esto.

Usted también puede leer este blog en su Kindle haciendo clic en la tienda Amazon Kindle en http://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 y puede escuchar mis pláticas en la red en http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

The Kinds of People You Need In Your Life

Only you know what is best for you and you know the kinds of people that you need in your life. This is because each and everyone of us are different and unique. Your needs will be different from others, your personality is different and so on and so this is why you know what is best for you and the kinds of people that you need in your life. However, there are certain kinds of people that we ALL need and this is so essential for our well being. These kinds of people are people who are mentally, emotionally and spiritually healthy (which I will explain more about this), people who love themselves, people who are comfortable with who they are and who have genuine goodness within them.

You don’t need people who are psychopaths, who are obsessive, who don’t have healthy boundaries, who don’t love themselves, who are envious because these kinds of people don’t have much to offer to you. Psychopaths, well, these people are all about sucking your energy and you don’t need that. People who are obsessive, they have certain ideas about you in relation to them that are just not healthy for you. Those who don’t have healthy boundaries, well, this can be a topic all on its own but not having healthy boundaries lead to unhealthy relationships. Those who don’t love themselves, they just don’t have the capacity to love others in a healthy way (this too could be a topic all on its own). Those who are envious just have negative energy to offer to you and they have issues of their own to resolve that you just can’t help them with.

Why am I writing all this? I’m writing this because the people who you surround yourself with play a huge role on your well-being. We are social beings and as social beings we do have a need to interact with others and to have a sense of community. However this need should not make you choose people who drain your energy, who rob you of your self-esteem, who make you feel wrong in any way, etc. We are all energy and it is for this reason that you want to make sure that you choose people who already have a healthy relationship with themselves, who already love themselves, who are genuinely good. Choosing people who are mentally, emotionally and spiritually healthy is so crucial to one’s health. When someone is mentally healthy, they have a healthy perspective in terms of their relation to you. So there is no room for this person to be possessive or obsessive. When someone is emotionally healthy, they feel so good about themselves despite any complex they may have and when they see someone who has a quality that they feel they lack, rather than being envious, they have admiration and respect. Someone who is spiritually healthy is always cultivating themselves, making sure that they attend to their needs and don’t place that responsibility onto someone else.

There are many factors that can contribute to someone feeling like their life is out of balance and I believe this is one of the many factors. The choice is yours to choose people who are healthy for you. Make sure that you choose people who love themselves. Make sure that you choose people with healthy boundaries. Make sure that you choose people who are mentally, emotionally and spiritually healthy. Your well-being depends on this.

You can also read this blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle at http://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.