Believe In Your Inner Reality

I feel so compelled to write about this in today’s blog because I am believing more and more that there are two kinds of realities in life- the outer reality and the inner reality. The conversations that I have had in these past days have been so enlightening for me and has proved to me that indeed there are two realities in life and that if we want to grow in well-being, we NEED to believe in our own inner reality and indeed ignore the outer reality.

We are indeed tempted to believe in our outer reality. We are tempted to believe that there is bad out there, that we can’t trust anyone, that love doesn’t exist anymore, that the older we get the more tired or sick we get. We are tempted to believe that the life we want, the house we want, the person that we want to be doesn’t exist. I’m here to tell you that all this are lies. Lies to hurt us. Lies to keep us down. Lies to shrink us. Lies to keep us from growing into all that we are capable and meant to be.

The moment we believe in these lies, the moment that we give into these lies is when those lies become a reality. Part of life is disappointments. Part of life is rejection. Part of life is hurt and thank god for all this! Why thank god? You probably think I’m nuts for this but the reason why you want to be thankful for all this is because all these things will lead you to growth. It leads you to knowing and understanding what you don’t want that will eventually lead you to the things that you do want.

Your inner reality is the one with the most power. It is the one that whether you realize or not, it dictates the actions that you take. How so? Whatever you think, you will subconsciously behave in ways that matches that what you think. Whatever you feel, you will subconsciously be lead to take actions that matches what you feel. Notice that when you feel sad, you feel like doing nothing, you feel like eating junk food, you most likely will have conversations that make you feel more down. All these things will just feed the emotion that you already feel, making it more intense and imprinting in your brain the reality that sadness is your reality. Notice that when you feel good, you start doing things that make you feel good. You feel like eating healthy. You naturally feel more energized which makes you radiate unto the eyes of others. All this with something as simple as feeling good. That’s how powerful our emotions are.

If you have the courage to believe in your inner reality, you will see that you already are and have all the things that you want. The reason why it isn’t a reality yet is because you may have some resistance to it and you don’t fully believe in the things you want. I have to admit, the biggest challenge is believing in your inner reality when the outer reality doesn’t seem to match. Regardless, it is CRUCIAL that you ignore your outer reality. Your current outer reality is a reflection of who you were in the past. You are experiencing the residual of your past. So your present is your past. I never fully understood this until I am now fully understanding its meaning.

Believe that you are that person that you know in your heart that you are. Believe you are a healthy person. Believe you have that house that you want. Believe you have that marriage that you want. You have to believe and stay away from conversations that contradict that inner reality. Stay away from people who have a negative undertone energy. Stay away from those who don’t believe in your dreams. Stay away from thoughts that make you sad. For the sake of this blog post, I will discuss in the next blog post how can you start to believe in your inner reality when your outer reality shows its opposite.

In the meantime, I would like to encourage you to believe. Start listening to music that uplifts you. Do things that make you feel good. Be around loving people. Know that you are love and that you are loved. Let’s start with that first and then on the next blog post, I can discuss how to believe in your inner reality. If you first start by feeling good, you will grow in well-being tremendously.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez. I now have a YouTube channel which I will ask that you subscribe for more tips to increase your well-being https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLZANKeRUFM4YvMXy4HzQrg.

 

 

The Ingredients For Healthy Relationships

I had a conversation a few days ago with a good friend of mine and we were talking about what makes a healthy relationship. It seems as though nowadays there is so much confusion about how one needs to be, how to properly communicate and there is so many question marks on people’s mind and all this is so unnecessary. So today’s post will be about the ingredients for healthy relationships because relationships do play an important role on our well-being.

You need healthy relationships and this includes your relationship with your family and friends and in romantic relationships. All the ingredients discussed in this post apply to all kinds of relationships.

First ingredient is maturity. It takes maturity to have a healthy relationship. Before I write what I mean with “maturity”, I will first write what teenagers do that adults should be way passed that stage. Teenagers or people who are not mature enough just text important discussions. This is a big no no because so much can be misunderstood through texts. Texting important discussions is a way to avoid what is going on and only teenagers or immature people do that. Mature people have either face to face or over the phone discussions. Why? Because it is important to confront situations head on in order to gain clarity and avoid hard feelings. Teenagers and immature people blame rather than understand their role in the situation. It takes maturity to admit that you too played a role in what happened in a situation and to take ownership for how the relationship goes. So what I mean with maturity is that one puts aside childish ways in order to be a grown adult. You can’t have healthy relationships with childish ways.

Second ingredient is communication. Healthy relationships require effective communication. This includes saying how one feels and listening to the other person. When I write “listen”, I don’t mean “hear”. Hearing is the mechanical aspect of what the ears do. Listening requires you to put aside what you are feeling and thinking and try to understand what the other person is saying so you can understand where they are coming from. It’s important to state clearly how you feel and what your intentions are. It’s important to be straight forward. It’s important as we get older to always make it a goal to be better in communication.

Third ingredient is honesty. Healthy relationships require that both parties are first and foremost honest with themselves and then with others. Honesty may not always be easy. It’s easy to want to lie to oneself for whatever the reason may be, either because of fear of the outcome, beliefs that we have told ourselves, etc. For two people to be on the same page, it is a must to first be honest with yourself and then with others. You deserve your own honesty and others deserve your honesty as well. Many friendships and relationships are severed because of this.

Fourth ingredient is confrontation. Healthy relationships confront with one another. It is unfortunate that the word “confrontation” has such a negative connotation but the reality is that how are two people supposed to be on the same page if they don’t confront?! Confrontation simply means two or more people coming together to discuss something. This requires maturity which is why I listed maturity as the first ingredient.

I’m sure there are more things that are required in order to have healthy relationships but for the sake of this blog, I am only including four of the ingredients that I consider to be the main ingredients for a healthy relationship.

If there is any relationship that you care about that you feel is not as healthy as you need it to be, I would like to encourage you to consider if any of these ingredients mentioned in today’s post is lacking and do your part to include this into that relationship. It takes all parties involved to make a healthy relationship, this means that this includes you.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.