Choose People Willing to Do the Inner Work

In today’s post, I want to discuss the importance of choosing people willing to do the inner work.

Healthy relationships start with you. When I write the word “relationships”, I mean any close interaction you have with another human being so this includes friendships, family members, and romantic relationships. How and why does a healthy relationship start with you? Because first you have to be right with you. You have to love yourself. You have to love life. You have to see your own potential. You have to see your own beauty. You have to see your own value. You need to be willing to do your inner work. Once all this is in place, then you choose based on that.

So say for example, if you don’t have a healthy relationship with yourself, without realizing it, you most likely will choose people that they are unhealthy themselves. A person with an unhealthy relationship with themselves won’t be able to choose people that are right for them either because deep down inside they don’t feel deserving of healthy love, etc. When you have a healthy relationship with yourself, you are quick to notice when something isn’t right for you and you let it go. This is why it is crucial that you are right with you first.

Just as it is important that you do your inner work, it is important that you choose people willing to do the inner work themselves. This is because people who are not right with themselves don’t have much to offer. We can only offer what we have. So someone who is afraid to make certain decisions and is afraid of happiness will only give fear to you. This means that if you try to engage in a relationship with them, they will confuse you to death because their actions will be that they will push you away or do something that turns you off, etc.

It is only when you are clear in who you are, what you want, on your value and what you deserve that you will get what you want and more. It is then when you can engage in healthy relationships with others, when you can feel great about your life, then attracting more great things into your life and have more to offer to others.

You can tell when someone is willing to do the inner work. How can you tell? Well, let me start off by stating the signs of someone not willing to do the inner work. The first sign is that they live in fear. They are afraid to be happy so they push people away. They have commitment issues that they are not willing to resolve. They are very judgmental of others for silly things. They always find fault in others. They choose to be in relationships or situations that don’t make them happy. They constantly talk about problems. You feel heaviness the moment you are with them. The list can go on. The point is that you end up wondering what happened, is there something wrong with you, your energy shifts for the worse and so on. None of this is good!

Doing the inner work requires one to be willing to look within themselves and work through any issues they may have. It requires one to challenge their limiting beliefs. It requires seeking help should one need help. It requires to notice the patterns in the choices one makes and then be willing to take responsibility for the role they played. Doing the inner work is not easy because of all the emotions that will resurface but it is necessary in order to uncover the things that are holding you back.

Be willing to choose people who are willing to do the inner work because doing so will lead to healthy relationships in which you yourself can blossom as a person. Because you deserve to be loved exactly for who you are; because you deserve to be fully happy; because you deserve a great life, you need to be the first one to be willing to do the inner work so you can then choose someone willing to do the same. You owe this to yourself.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

How to Fill the Inner Void

Today I would like to write about something that seems to be real for some and this kind of struggle is very real. The struggle that I am referring to is the one of an inner void.

Since well-being starts with you, this means that it starts with being whole. Being whole by default means that there is no void. Now, one thing that I would like to clarify is that it is perfectly normal to have certain needs that are just innate because we are human beings. These needs that I am referring to are- the need to feel needed, to be accepted, to be loved and the need for companionship. These needs are built within us because as human beings we are emotional and social beings. So having these needs does not mean that you are not whole.

However, when these needs are heightened to the point where you are willing to compromise your well-being to have these needs met, this is when there is a void that needs to be filled. I think many confuse having needs with having a void when there is a fine line between the two and that line is when those needs become so strong to the point that you are willing to compromise your well-being.

With all this said, how can one fill an inner void? Perhaps for some, they may not like what I’m about to write because maybe some are searching for immediate results to what they are currently feeling but I can guarantee you that greater satisfaction comes from going to the root of things. So the first place to start is by recognizing your inner value. It is important that you see and cherish your own inner value because when you see how valuable you are as a person, you will expect others to treat you like so. You start seeing your value by recognizing the attributes that you possess that make you an amazing person. It doesn’t matter if others have those same attributes, believe and know that there is something unique about you that no one else has.

Think about the things that bring you joy and start doing those things often. The more things you do that you enjoy, the better you will feel about yourself because you are nurturing your true essence which is your soul. This is one part of us that some tend to neglect and doing so can be detrimental overtime. Give yourself the time to feed your soul with things that makes it happy.

Surround yourself by people who appreciate you for who you are. Choose healthy relationships. Whether we realize it or not, the people that we surround ourselves by do have an influence on our self-concept and self-esteem. Choose people who have a healthy self-esteem, who love themselves, who are happy with their life and who are willing to do the inner work. I will discuss on another blog why it is important to choose people who are willing to do the inner work.

The last thing I will recommend that you do is to take the time to get to know who you are. There is tremendous power in knowing who you really are. When you have a deep understanding of who you are, you know what your needs are in every area of your life. When you have a deep understanding of who you are, you are more accepting of who you are and the choices that you make regardless of whether others are accepting of you or not. This understanding allows you to be in alignment which leads to greater well-being.

I am not going to lie to you that filling a void takes effort but that is effort that is worth it. If you want to fill that void completely and feel great on a consistent basis, you have to have that deep understanding and appreciate of yourself. Your relationship with yourself is the foundation in which everything is built upon. When you feel void, you are not going to have much to offer to others. You will be coming from a place of neediness and anxiety and others will sense that because that is what you will be emanating.

I would like to encourage you to start looking at the traits that make you an amazing person. Start doing the things that make you very happy. Surround yourself by people who have a healthy self-esteem and who love their life. Have a great relationship with yourself. The moment you start filling yourself up, you won’t be heightening the natural needs that is only normal to have.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

Overwhelmed: A Plague to Your Well-being

Feeling overwhelmed can be very disabling and it is precisely for this reason that I must discuss this on this blog.

Well-being is about joy, balance, harmony, good energy and loving life. Feeling overwhelmed takes away from all this and that’s when ailments can start. If you are feeling sick, tired most of the time, mentally clouded and a lack of purpose and joy, ask yourself if you’re feeling overwhelmed.

There are many reasons one can feel overwhelmed, one of them being having so much to do. I do want to emphasize that feeling overwhelmed is not equivalent to being busy. A good friend of mine, Dawn, brought up a very important distinction during one of our conversations and it is this- being busy isn’t equivalent to being productive. Why do I feel it is important to mention this? Because perhaps your feeling of overwhelm comes from being busy of not being productive.

When feeling overwhelmed, it is important to understand the cause. Is it all the responsibilities that you have that causes this feeling? If so, why? Is it that there are changes that you want to occur? If so, what are these changes? Is it a relationship that you currently have that makes you feel overwhelmed? If so, why is that?

Many times the feeling of overwhelm comes from some dissatisfaction that we currently have and are not aware of it. This is why I have stated over and over again that it is important to pay attention to your emotions. It is important to embrace them. They are feedback from your soul. By ignoring your emotions, you are ignoring important information from your true essence.

When feeling overwhelmed it is important to embrace it, sit with it and understand it. Once you take the time to understand it, you will know what steps to take in order to feel better.

So if you are currently feel overwhelmed, I want to encourage you to embrace it, sit with it and understand it. Don’t avoid feeling this way because otherwise you will be missing on important info that can lead to greater change and well-being.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

The Things That Held You Back

Some people may look back and realize that there were several things that held them back. Perhaps those things were the people around them, perhaps their environment, their childhood, their limiting beliefs, etc. and for some, the very thought of these things holding them back keeps holding them back.

The one thing you can never recuperate is time. Once time is gone, it’s gone. However, you still have more time ahead of you. The longer you keep looking back at the things that held you back, the more held back you will be. The things that once held you back don’t need to continue holding you back.

If you are held back for whatever reason, I want you to seriously consider the fact that perhaps it is you who is holding you back. Why do I dare you to consider this? Because the reality is that you can NOT control what others do. You can NOT control how others think. NO ONE has power over you. NO ONE can define you. NO ONE, unless you grant them permission, can do anything in your life.

I want to briefly discuss about childhood and this is one that is difficult to talk about since I know for some there were probably serious childhood issues. Once you become an adult, YOU have the choice as to whether or not you are going to continue to allow what happened to you to affect you. If you realize that the issues are too deep that you can’t handle them alone, then go seek a therapist or a psychologist. Get the help you need but don’t continue to allow your past to affect you in negative ways.

I want to briefly discuss limiting beliefs. It is a must to find the source of the limiting beliefs. You may be surprised to learn that the limiting belief you may have is someone else’s beliefs and you just internalized it as your own belief. It is important to challenge your beliefs if you are to grow into the person that you are meant to be.

I want to briefly discuss your environment. You don’t have to be your environment. If your environment isn’t congruent with the person that you are, that doesn’t mean that who you really are is wrong. Just like not all trees can grow in the same environment, we all can’t grow in the same environment. Know that you are much more than your environment if your environment is not a reflection of you. Also know that just because you are not like your environment, that doesn’t make you wrong. That just means that you are you and that’s it. There is nothing wrong with that.

The last thing I want to briefly discuss is people. What people think or say about you is none of your business. Your business is YOU and that’s it. Once again, you can’t control what other people do. You can’t control how other people think. People can only hold you back if you allow them to hold you back. Also people’s complexes and criticisms are non of your business. What other people decide to do with their life you can not control. The only person you can control is yourself so start to control yourself so that you can have the life that you want.

It is a must to control your thoughts, your emotions, your decisions, your actions and what you allow in your life. Remember that nothing needs to hold you back unless you ALLOW it to hold you back. This is the key word- allow. Remember that you are the only one who can allow things to hold you back.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

 

Get Sick of Wishing

Today I would like to encourage you to get sick of wishing. Why? Because wishing will take you nowhere. The secret to life, apart from knowing what you want, is taking action towards what you want.

So get sick of wishing for better health. Know that great health is in your hands by making better choices, by choosing healthy foods, by making the effort to exercise, by choosing to educate yourself in regards to any medications you are taking, any illness you may have and educating yourself in regards to the body.

Get sick of wishing for a better relationship. Work everyday on the relationship that you have because you are part of the equation of making that relationship work. If the relationship just isn’t working anymore, know that you have two choices- you either put in the effort it takes to make the relationship better or you decide it’s best to part ways. Either way relationship is work and great things do require effort. Also work on cultivating that relationship. Relationships need to be nurtured in order to thrive.

Get sick of wishing you had a better job and either make the best of the job you have or change it. Complaining all the time about the job that you have doesn’t help. It just helps at the moment because you are releasing the tension that you are feeling but what are you doing to change the situation? That is what matters most, what you are doing right now to change the situation.

Get sick of wishing you had a better life. I personally don’t believe in the could’ve, would’ve, should’ve. You either are or you’re not, you either do or you don’t, you either know or you don’t. That life that you want is in your hands. Let me repeat, that life that you want is in your hands. It’s not in someone else’s hands. It’s not in someone else’s power. You have the power to decide what you will do with your life.

Get sick of wishing for more because if you want more, you have to go get it. Many people want more, who doesn’t but it is not a matter of wanting more, it is a matter of doing more.

Yes, get sick of wishing. Your well-being depends on it because for as long as you are wishing, you might as well just keep on waiting. Life is not for those who wish, it is for those who do- so get sick of wishing.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

The Different Ways of Being Healthy

I think we all know it’s important to be physically healthy. This is the most visible part of us, making it obvious the kind of lifestyle we have. For as much as taking care of our physical body is important, there are other ways to be healthy that are equally important if not even more since when these parts of us are not healthy, the physical body will suffer as well. It is important to be healthy mentally and emotionally and this is what this post will be about.

First I would like to discuss how can you know when you are not healthy mentally and emotionally. One of the most simple ways is by looking around you. Does your life reflect what you deserve? What kind of relationships do you have with others? What kind of relationship do you have with yourself? Do you have any kind of destructive, unhealthy relationship in your life? How are you feeling most of the time? All these questions are indicators as to how is your mental and emotional state.

In other words, if you block out your own happiness, if you are living in fear, if you are being pessimistic, if you push away good things or people, if you live in the past and it is a hurtful past, if you allow negativity, then you are unhealthy mentally and emotionally.

What many may not realize is that for as much as one may want to put a band-aid on a huge wound or ignore the real problems in their life, one can NEVER reach full happiness. Full happiness comes from dealing with your issues when your issues are preventing good in your life. Yes, it is hard to open that luggage and go through everything and throw away what is not serving you but that’s when you have to ask yourself if it’s serving you to carry such a heavy luggage to begin with.

What does it mean to be healthy mentally and emotionally? It means to feel good about yourself and your life, to accept abundance, to accept and let in happiness, to know you are deserving, to know that you deserve to be loved right by others, to allow people who help you grow and who truly love you. It is mentally having the capacity to do away with things, situations and people who don’t serve you. It is being able to not stress what doesn’t matter. It is being able to focus more on the positive than the negative. It is doing whatever possible to develop mental and emotional agility in order to bounce right back from any disappointment. Being emotionally healthy is being able to love yourself even when others may not love you, forgiving yourself for your own mistakes and being able to accept yourself even when others may not accept you. It is you loving yourself more than anyone else. This act of love is a must since it is this kind of love that will prevent you from allowing situations, things or people who don’t make you feel good.

Being physically healthy indeed is very important but one can not forget how extremely important it is to be healthy also mentally and emotionally. When mentally and emotionally you are not right, there is no way to be right physically as well since all three parts are connected. If you feel your life isn’t the way you want it to be, I encourage you to look into these two parts of you and if you need intervention, by all means go see a psychologist or therapist. This is an investment that you are making in yourself and you are worth the investment. Your mind and emotions are assets to be taking care of, so make sure you do what you can to have these parts of you healthy.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

Fillers Are Just That….Fillers!

I think and observe and I’ve come to the conclusion that so many things are filled with fillers. Normally when one hears or reads the word “fillers”, they may think of supplements since there are supplements filled with fillers but claim to just have vitamins and minerals. Well, it’s not just supplements that have fillers, I challenge you to think if you are filling your life up with fillers.

What are these fillers that I am referring to? Well, fillers can be many things. It can be you being so concerned for another person as a way to not pay attention to what you need to be concerned with which is yourself. It can be you getting distracted with something that only adds drama into your life in order to fill up a void you may have. It can be you trying to put a band-aid on a wound that still needs to heal. All these things are just filling up on something that needs to be worked on.

Fillers in food can be toxic over time. This is because the body was not designed to handle those kinds of chemicals. Same thing with the fillers that one may try to add onto their life. You are meant to feel whole and great on a consistent basis but you can’t for as long as you avoid the real issues in your life. One thing I need to clarify in this post is that when I write, “you being so concerned for another person”, I am not referring if you are a mother or father of a young child or teenager or if you are a son or daughter who is there for an elder parent. That is NOT what I am referring to. I am referring to whether you are worried and concerned about everyone else except for yourself. It is important to remember that if you don’t take care of yourself, you won’t be in the right position to care for another person.

Fillers are also toxic because overtime, the body gets to a point where it can no longer handle what is being ingested. The same thing goes to fillers that you allow in your own life. Overtime, those fillers either won’t be enough to get you to a point of wholeness or those fillers will be toxic for you mentally and emotionally. There is a Spanish saying “no puede tapar el sol con un dedo” which means “you can’t cover the sun with a finger”. You can’t hide for long what is really wrong in your life. You can’t deny for long what needs to change in your life, otherwise it will all catch up to you.

If you currently find yourself or know someone who finds themselves trying to do everything possible to fill themselves up in ways that are unhealthy, I encourage you and the other person, then, to think about any ways that you may be filling your life up with fillers. You deserve a whole and great life and certainly fillers are not the way to get there.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.