How You May Unknowingly Be Stepping Away From Your Power

Sometimes we do things we don’t realize that hurt us. We all want happiness, there is no denying of that but we sometimes unknowingly make ourselves unhappy. Being unhappy takes away from your well-being. Part of happiness is knowing and stepping into your power and it is because of this that I would like to write about how you may unknowingly be stepping away from your power.

You unknowingly step away from your power when you hold on to things, situations, people, relationships, etc. that don’t serve you or don’t make you happy. I know how hard it can be to let go, trust me I do. I have held on to people and situations for way too long that didn’t serve me at all. If anything, holding on to those people and situations were just a waste of my time and it made me feel worse and worse with time. So do yourself a favor and let go NOW of the things that no longer serve you. It is important to trust that things are still working out for your favor no matter what.

You unknowingly step away from your power when you are not honest with yourself. I believe I wrote a post on the importance of being honest with yourself even if it hurts. Being honest liberates you. It’s best to feel bad now for a little bit than feel really bad down the road because you were not honest with yourself. Honesty can be one of the hardest things to do but it is a must if you are to grow in well-being. It will liberate you from things and situations you don’t need in your life.

You unknowingly step away from your power when you are not grateful for what you have at this very moment. I don’t know how to describe it but there is something so soothing about thanking God, the universe, whatever you believe in, for all that you currently have. There is emotional and mental power in you being grateful for all you have right now. It brings joy, it brings peace and you will feel loved when you live in gratitude.

You unknowingly step away from your power when you focus on the things that go wrong instead of all the things that are right with your life. Your focus is everything. Your focus determines your energy, your perspective, your emotions, your current physical state since mind influences the way the body will be, etc. Focus on what’s right and more right things will come to you. If this doesn’t come easy, just take baby steps. Catch yourself when you focus on the negative things and change it to positive things.

You unknowingly step away from your power when your self-talk is negative. It’s important to learn to be your own cheerleader. Not all the time will those who usually cheer you up be there when you need them. This is why you need to learn to be your own cheerleader and you do this through your self-talk. If your vocabulary consists of negative words and phrases, this needs to be changed if you are to change your life. Be mindful of the words you use and be mindful of the energy behind those words. The energy, too, matters a lot.

This post would be very long if I were to list more ways that you may unknowingly step away from your power but pay attention to one key indicator that doesn’t lie and it is your emotions. If your emotions are negative emotions, pay attention to how you may have unknowingly stepped away from your power. Your emotions don’t lie. Start now to step into your power. Doing this will add greatly to your well-being.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.
You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez. I now have a YouTube channel which I will ask that you subscribe for more tips to increase your well-being https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLZANKeRUFM4YvMXy4HzQrg.
And if you would like to bring even more nature into your home, you can do what I do when I need a pick-me-up o when I have a headache, etc. and use the following oils that help me have more balance in life and I’m sure it will help you as well. http://my.doterra.com/Auraemartinez. You can also contact me so that I can help you choose the oils that will best help you.

To What Degree Is Vulnerability Not Good?

What makes me address this topic of vulnerability are two things: 1. as human beings it’s only normal and human to be vulnerable. Vulnerability is what makes us human, what can humble us and we can actually grow from our vulnerabilities. 2. I read an article that was a bit disturbing about someone who I will not mention the name but the fact that some people have mentioned how she uses other people’s vulnerability to exploit them just saddens. Although being vulnerable is only human, there is a certain degree of vulnerability that is not good and it is this kind of vulnerability that I would like to discuss in today’s blog post.

Many may want to hide their vulnerability and that’s understandable. I don’t think anyone wants others to think that they are weak or anything negative of that sort. I would like to make emphasis once again that there is nothing wrong with being and feeling vulnerable because that is what makes us human. It also doesn’t make you a weak person. However, like anything, too much is the same as too little. Being and feeling too vulnerable to the degree that look outside of yourself so much to the point that you don’t look within can be very dangerous territory to tread.

I looked up two places for the definition of vulnerability. On Google, the definition was “the quality or state of being exposed to the possibility of being attacked or harmed, either physically or emotionally”. On the Cambridge English dictionary, the definition was “able to be easily hurt, influenced, or attacked”. There is a point I want to prove with these two definitions. If you are “exposed emotionally” in terms of you feeling hurt because you are grieving or you went through some trauma or you feel depressed at the moment or anxious, any of the things that human beings go through, in this case, there is nothing wrong with being vulnerable because it takes courage to be vulnerable and come out of all that stronger. However, if you are “able to be easily hurt, influenced, or attacked”, then vulnerability is a problem.

I also would like to discuss the part of the first definition of vulnerability “….being exposed to the possibility of being attacked or harmed…”. I think the word itself has had a bad reputation, for lack of a better word, because it is when someone is vulnerable when they can “feel” or “think” they are defenseless. I would like to encourage you to believe that vulnerability does not mean powerless. Vulnerability can take you to greater heights in being able to understand others in a way that some perhaps may not. You will only be defenseless if that’s what you believe and if you give your power away just because life threw something at you that you were not prepare for.

Now on to the kind of vulnerability that is not good. Vulnerability is not good when that puts you in a position where you no longer validate yourself. When you need others to validate you constantly because you feel powerless, that’s a problem. Trauma, childhood issues, abuse, depression, anxiety, none of this need to make you powerless. You are a beautiful being, made to perfection even with your imperfections and made with a purpose.

Vulnerability is not good when you give someone the power to make the decisions for you, to tell you what is right for you or anything of that sort. YOU have the power to make your own right decisions. YOU are the only one who truly knows what is right for you. Others can help lead you to your own path and help you figure it out on your own but if you need someone else to lead you rather than you lead yourself, this kind of vulnerability is not good.

Vulnerability is not good when you allow mistreatment from others. When you are not aware of other people’s mistreatment because you are too “vulnerable” to realize this, this is a major problem. Yes, as human beings we need love, to be needed and to belong but it should never be at the price of our self-esteem. It’s too expensive to lose your peace of mind, dignity and self-love.

Vulnerability…..it’s one of those topics that must be discussed since it affects our well-being but we determine how we let it affect us. It can affect us in a positive way if we allow ourselves to grow from the experience or it can affect us in a negative way, allowing it to rob our self-worth, our power and our connection with ourselves.

This is my longest blog post yet and it was because of that disturbing article I read that I needed to address this topic. If you are feeling vulnerable at this moment, I would like to please encourage you to utilize your vulnerability for growth, not for self-destruction. It’s necessary for “bad” things to happen because we can grow from it and be better because of it. Of course, I quote the word bad because this word can mean different things for different people. It is with the intention of helping you view vulnerability in a lighter light that I write this blog post.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez. I now have a YouTube channel which I will ask that you subscribe for more tips to increase your well-being https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLZANKeRUFM4YvMXy4HzQrg.

 

Nothing Belongs to You

“What in the world Aura?! Nothing belongs to me?! What kind of a post is this when it comes to my well-being?!” you may wonder. Well, in today’s post, I want to give you a perspective that can make you stronger and even a healthier person because indeed nothing belongs to you.

It’s sad to lose. It’s sad to lose a parent, a child, a spouse, a relationship, a job, anything, you name it. The reason why these things hurt is because of the meaning that they have for us or the meaning we have attached to it. However, if you can adopt the mindset and the knowing that nothing belongs to you, then nothing will hurt so much to the point of extreme pain.

One thing I want to clarify is that with this post, I am not encouraging coldness. I am not encouraging isolation nor lack of attachment to people or things. Belonging and relationships are what add meaning to our life. But it is the healthy belonging and healthy relationships what add meaning to our life. Unhealthy attachments to anything only leads to misery and lack of well-being.

Nothing belongs to you in the sense that nothing is truly your property- not a spouse, not a parent, not a job, not a child, nothing. Your true property is your body- your brain and your life. When you understand this with your mind and soul, letting go of things can be a bit easier. It is not easy to let go of things or people you care about, but when you can remember that nothing belongs to you, you know that things can go at any time.

Nothing belongs to you frees you from having to prove yourself to others. All you are supposed to be is your best self and when this is who you are, then those who are supposed to be in your life will be in your life. There needs to be a balance to things and although you are responsible, say for example, for the relationship that you have with your spouse, you can’t be something that you are not to please him or her. So this concept of “nothing belongs to you” frees you to just be yourself without any worries.

Nothing belongs to you makes you less attached which makes you less of a slave. That’s right! Strong attachments can make us a slave- a slave of hurt, a slave of the past, a slave of dependence, a slave to misery, etc. The best freedom to have is the freedom to be who you are truly meant to be which is a joyful, healthy person. In order to be this joyful, healthy person, you can’t have strong attachments to anything.

Nothing belongs to you frees you to happiness because it is then when your happiness isn’t dependent on someone else’s actions or lack of action, a situation, etc. When nothing belongs to you, all you care about is what you have control over which are your reaction to things, your emotions, your thoughts and your actions. That’s it.

The “nothing belongs to you” notion is a must to increase in well-being. This is not about being cold, not having any attachments or not caring. On the contrary, this is about having healthy attachments and about love- love towards yourself AND others. Yes, this is even about loving others because loving others is about freeing them to make their own choices even when we don’t like the choices they make. Loving others is about allowing others to be as they please even when it doesn’t please us. Loving others is also about losing them even when it hurts.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

The Things That Held You Back

Some people may look back and realize that there were several things that held them back. Perhaps those things were the people around them, perhaps their environment, their childhood, their limiting beliefs, etc. and for some, the very thought of these things holding them back keeps holding them back.

The one thing you can never recuperate is time. Once time is gone, it’s gone. However, you still have more time ahead of you. The longer you keep looking back at the things that held you back, the more held back you will be. The things that once held you back don’t need to continue holding you back.

If you are held back for whatever reason, I want you to seriously consider the fact that perhaps it is you who is holding you back. Why do I dare you to consider this? Because the reality is that you can NOT control what others do. You can NOT control how others think. NO ONE has power over you. NO ONE can define you. NO ONE, unless you grant them permission, can do anything in your life.

I want to briefly discuss about childhood and this is one that is difficult to talk about since I know for some there were probably serious childhood issues. Once you become an adult, YOU have the choice as to whether or not you are going to continue to allow what happened to you to affect you. If you realize that the issues are too deep that you can’t handle them alone, then go seek a therapist or a psychologist. Get the help you need but don’t continue to allow your past to affect you in negative ways.

I want to briefly discuss limiting beliefs. It is a must to find the source of the limiting beliefs. You may be surprised to learn that the limiting belief you may have is someone else’s beliefs and you just internalized it as your own belief. It is important to challenge your beliefs if you are to grow into the person that you are meant to be.

I want to briefly discuss your environment. You don’t have to be your environment. If your environment isn’t congruent with the person that you are, that doesn’t mean that who you really are is wrong. Just like not all trees can grow in the same environment, we all can’t grow in the same environment. Know that you are much more than your environment if your environment is not a reflection of you. Also know that just because you are not like your environment, that doesn’t make you wrong. That just means that you are you and that’s it. There is nothing wrong with that.

The last thing I want to briefly discuss is people. What people think or say about you is none of your business. Your business is YOU and that’s it. Once again, you can’t control what other people do. You can’t control how other people think. People can only hold you back if you allow them to hold you back. Also people’s complexes and criticisms are non of your business. What other people decide to do with their life you can not control. The only person you can control is yourself so start to control yourself so that you can have the life that you want.

It is a must to control your thoughts, your emotions, your decisions, your actions and what you allow in your life. Remember that nothing needs to hold you back unless you ALLOW it to hold you back. This is the key word- allow. Remember that you are the only one who can allow things to hold you back.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

 

The Different Ways of Being Healthy

I think we all know it’s important to be physically healthy. This is the most visible part of us, making it obvious the kind of lifestyle we have. For as much as taking care of our physical body is important, there are other ways to be healthy that are equally important if not even more since when these parts of us are not healthy, the physical body will suffer as well. It is important to be healthy mentally and emotionally and this is what this post will be about.

First I would like to discuss how can you know when you are not healthy mentally and emotionally. One of the most simple ways is by looking around you. Does your life reflect what you deserve? What kind of relationships do you have with others? What kind of relationship do you have with yourself? Do you have any kind of destructive, unhealthy relationship in your life? How are you feeling most of the time? All these questions are indicators as to how is your mental and emotional state.

In other words, if you block out your own happiness, if you are living in fear, if you are being pessimistic, if you push away good things or people, if you live in the past and it is a hurtful past, if you allow negativity, then you are unhealthy mentally and emotionally.

What many may not realize is that for as much as one may want to put a band-aid on a huge wound or ignore the real problems in their life, one can NEVER reach full happiness. Full happiness comes from dealing with your issues when your issues are preventing good in your life. Yes, it is hard to open that luggage and go through everything and throw away what is not serving you but that’s when you have to ask yourself if it’s serving you to carry such a heavy luggage to begin with.

What does it mean to be healthy mentally and emotionally? It means to feel good about yourself and your life, to accept abundance, to accept and let in happiness, to know you are deserving, to know that you deserve to be loved right by others, to allow people who help you grow and who truly love you. It is mentally having the capacity to do away with things, situations and people who don’t serve you. It is being able to not stress what doesn’t matter. It is being able to focus more on the positive than the negative. It is doing whatever possible to develop mental and emotional agility in order to bounce right back from any disappointment. Being emotionally healthy is being able to love yourself even when others may not love you, forgiving yourself for your own mistakes and being able to accept yourself even when others may not accept you. It is you loving yourself more than anyone else. This act of love is a must since it is this kind of love that will prevent you from allowing situations, things or people who don’t make you feel good.

Being physically healthy indeed is very important but one can not forget how extremely important it is to be healthy also mentally and emotionally. When mentally and emotionally you are not right, there is no way to be right physically as well since all three parts are connected. If you feel your life isn’t the way you want it to be, I encourage you to look into these two parts of you and if you need intervention, by all means go see a psychologist or therapist. This is an investment that you are making in yourself and you are worth the investment. Your mind and emotions are assets to be taking care of, so make sure you do what you can to have these parts of you healthy.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

Fillers Are Just That….Fillers!

I think and observe and I’ve come to the conclusion that so many things are filled with fillers. Normally when one hears or reads the word “fillers”, they may think of supplements since there are supplements filled with fillers but claim to just have vitamins and minerals. Well, it’s not just supplements that have fillers, I challenge you to think if you are filling your life up with fillers.

What are these fillers that I am referring to? Well, fillers can be many things. It can be you being so concerned for another person as a way to not pay attention to what you need to be concerned with which is yourself. It can be you getting distracted with something that only adds drama into your life in order to fill up a void you may have. It can be you trying to put a band-aid on a wound that still needs to heal. All these things are just filling up on something that needs to be worked on.

Fillers in food can be toxic over time. This is because the body was not designed to handle those kinds of chemicals. Same thing with the fillers that one may try to add onto their life. You are meant to feel whole and great on a consistent basis but you can’t for as long as you avoid the real issues in your life. One thing I need to clarify in this post is that when I write, “you being so concerned for another person”, I am not referring if you are a mother or father of a young child or teenager or if you are a son or daughter who is there for an elder parent. That is NOT what I am referring to. I am referring to whether you are worried and concerned about everyone else except for yourself. It is important to remember that if you don’t take care of yourself, you won’t be in the right position to care for another person.

Fillers are also toxic because overtime, the body gets to a point where it can no longer handle what is being ingested. The same thing goes to fillers that you allow in your own life. Overtime, those fillers either won’t be enough to get you to a point of wholeness or those fillers will be toxic for you mentally and emotionally. There is a Spanish saying “no puede tapar el sol con un dedo” which means “you can’t cover the sun with a finger”. You can’t hide for long what is really wrong in your life. You can’t deny for long what needs to change in your life, otherwise it will all catch up to you.

If you currently find yourself or know someone who finds themselves trying to do everything possible to fill themselves up in ways that are unhealthy, I encourage you and the other person, then, to think about any ways that you may be filling your life up with fillers. You deserve a whole and great life and certainly fillers are not the way to get there.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

Take Off the Blindfold!

Blindfolds are only good for sleeping, they are not good to be wearing as you are going about your day. You need clarity in life, you need transparency, you need to know where you are going- something that a blindfold prevents you from having.

The blindfold that I am referring is clearly not the actual blindfold that some may wear at night. The blindfold that I am referring to is the invisible one that we sometimes decide to wear. Yes, I dare to write that “we sometimes decide to wear” because at any moment, we can decide to see things for what they are.

First, I want to start of by discussing why one may decide to wear a blindfold. There may be several reasons but I believe the most basic and biggest one and I would dare say THE reason is the needs that one may have. Yes, needs can be a bitch. The need to feel loved, the need to feel accepted and the need to belong, those basic human needs can make us a slave willing to wear a blindfold. Needs when not met can make us very hungry and it is that hunger that drives us to wear that blindfold.

Blindfolds are horrible for everyday life because they don’t allow you to see where you are going. You make yourself vulnerable to tripping and falling which can lead you to hurting yourself so badly. Not knowing where you are going can make you feel vulnerable and not in a good way. Not knowing where you are going can lead you to make unwise decisions. Not knowing where you are going makes you allow anything that come your way and I can tell you from personal experience that not everything that comes your way may be for good. This is why it is important to know where you are going.

Blindfolds prevent you from seeing what is in front of you. Many times people hint us as to who they really are and what their intentions are but we decide to ignore them because we feel the need to belong or feel loved or be accepted. Because not everything that comes your way may be good, it is important to already know that you are love and are loved so that you can come from a place of clearly seeing who the person that is in front of you is and what their intentions are towards you. You don’t want to ignore red flags.

The best way to prevent wearing a blindfold is to understand what makes you wear one to begin with. It is only through understanding that you are able to know what triggers this. Remember that blindfolds are not good for you to wear when it comes to everyday life- they prevent you from seeing where you are going and what is in front of you.

You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.