Reframe That Obligation

In today’s post, I would like to encourage you to something that perhaps at first may not seem to really make a difference in your life but it will. Have you ever wondered why going to work doesn’t feel the same as it did when you first started working at your job? Have you thought that your relationship feels like another job rather than something that you enjoy being a part of? Have you questioned yourself why something that you once loved doing you no longer love anymore? Although there can be many reasons for feeling this way, there is one thing that is a common denominator for some and it is the word obligation.

The word obligation, if you think about it, can tense the body. That’s because there is an implication that it is something that one must do rather than because one wants to do. Must and want are two different things. These verbs even feel different to the body and to the brain. It is because of this reason that I would like to encourage you to reframe the word obligation. Instead, I would like to encourage you to reframe it to choice.

Remember, and this is true, that everything is a choice. You working where you work is a choice. It is your choice to work at the job that you work. There are other jobs or careers out there and you instead chose the one you have. Remember that it is a choice to have the husband/wife/companion that you have. You showing affection, love, giving attention, all this you do it because you chose to love this person. So choose to see and know that you investing in your relationships is not an obligation, instead, it’s something that you choose to do.

You living where you live is a choice. You are not obligated to stay where you don’t want to stay. The environment in general is a choice. You choose the kind of people that you want to surround yourself with.

One thing I would like to clarify is that I am aware and I do understand that for some this may not be the case. I do understand that for those who, say for example, have a family to support, there may not be a choice in terms of the job that you may do because you may need the money. But there are two things that are choices and that is that you decided to have a family AND you can change the way you view your job. If you can change your perception of these two things, you can change the way you feel.

Everything must come from a place of love. Obligation doesn’t breed love. Wanting does. The moment you make things an obligation, that’s when things start to lose its glamour. Obligation can make the soul lazy. Laziness can numb us from our joy. The way to bring light and happiness to the things that we once enjoyed is by bringing back that love- love for our work, love for our partner, love for everything.

Remind yourself of the reason why you fell in love with your husband/wife/companion! Remind yourself of why you chose the job you have! Remind yourself how happy you were when you first had that job! Remind yourself when you first bought that house! Remind yourself so that you can start reframing those obligations that you have into choices that you have made. There are times that we must remember in order to get back to our happy place.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez. I now have a YouTube channel which I will ask that you subscribe for more tips to increase your well-being https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLZANKeRUFM4YvMXy4HzQrg.

 

How to Come From a Place of Authenticity

These past few months and especially now, have been a bit of a turmoil inside me and I am starting to embrace that turmoil. “Aura in a turmoil?” you may wonder. The turmoil that I am referring to is the one where there are debates inside me about things that I need to seriously consider in my life. And it is this turmoil that inspires me to write the following post.

I think that at times it may be a challenge to come from a place of authenticity because of pressures of life. Or is it really the pressures of life? I question this because many times the pressures that we feel are not pressures that are coming from outside of us, they are actually coming from within us. So I would like to encourage you just like I am doing at the moment, to consider the following: What are some pressures that you are currently placing on yourself? Why are you placing those pressures onto yourself?

Many times our obligations rob us from feeling free. They make us feel as if there is one chore to do after another and then another. This can then make us feel as if we can’t breathe. As if there is never a moment to take a break. I would like to encourage you to ask yourself the following: Is it really an obligation that is holding you back? Do you really have obligations or are they things that you have imposed on yourself? Are they obligations or are they choices that you have made? The reason why I want to encourage you to question this is because many times what we call obligations are merely choices that we have made that we are not really conscious that they are choices.

I think it’s easy to want to look outside for the things we want- acceptance, love, understanding, respect, attention. But the biggest mistake in this is that the moment we do that, we give up our power. Many times the emptiness that one feels is something beyond anything anyone or anything else can provide. I would like to encourage you to ask yourself the following questions: Is what I’m missing something that I am not providing to myself? If so, why am I not providing that to myself? Do I feel powerless? If so, then how can I regain my power back?

You see, the reason why I lightly touch on some topics that one needs to pay attention to is because your authentic self lies within you. It lies in understanding yourself. It lies in taking responsibility for your life. It lies in knowing your true essence so well. It lies in taking your power back.

When you put unnecessary stress on yourself, when you feel obligated to do things, when you pressure yourself, all these things rob your joy, your freedom and your authenticity. Although everyone is different and unique, your authentic self is to be happy, energetic, in love with life and with yourself. When that is not the case, when you are not happy in any shape or form, then it’s time to reconsider things in your life. Perhaps the changes that you need are minor, perhaps these are things that are not a big deal, but what I can certainly say is that these are not things to be ignored.

Learn to honor your emotions, just don’t sit with them too long if they are negative emotions. Learn to understand your emotions. Discover who you are and what makes you tick. Discover what would make your heart jump for joy. Even discover the things that don’t make you happy. The more you discover these things for yourself, the more authentic you can become.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez. I now have a YouTube channel which I will ask that you subscribe for more tips to increase your well-being https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLZANKeRUFM4YvMXy4HzQrg.