To What Degree Is Vulnerability Not Good?

What makes me address this topic of vulnerability are two things: 1. as human beings it’s only normal and human to be vulnerable. Vulnerability is what makes us human, what can humble us and we can actually grow from our vulnerabilities. 2. I read an article that was a bit disturbing about someone who I will not mention the name but the fact that some people have mentioned how she uses other people’s vulnerability to exploit them just saddens. Although being vulnerable is only human, there is a certain degree of vulnerability that is not good and it is this kind of vulnerability that I would like to discuss in today’s blog post.

Many may want to hide their vulnerability and that’s understandable. I don’t think anyone wants others to think that they are weak or anything negative of that sort. I would like to make emphasis once again that there is nothing wrong with being and feeling vulnerable because that is what makes us human. It also doesn’t make you a weak person. However, like anything, too much is the same as too little. Being and feeling too vulnerable to the degree that look outside of yourself so much to the point that you don’t look within can be very dangerous territory to tread.

I looked up two places for the definition of vulnerability. On Google, the definition was “the quality or state of being exposed to the possibility of being attacked or harmed, either physically or emotionally”. On the Cambridge English dictionary, the definition was “able to be easily hurt, influenced, or attacked”. There is a point I want to prove with these two definitions. If you are “exposed emotionally” in terms of you feeling hurt because you are grieving or you went through some trauma or you feel depressed at the moment or anxious, any of the things that human beings go through, in this case, there is nothing wrong with being vulnerable because it takes courage to be vulnerable and come out of all that stronger. However, if you are “able to be easily hurt, influenced, or attacked”, then vulnerability is a problem.

I also would like to discuss the part of the first definition of vulnerability “….being exposed to the possibility of being attacked or harmed…”. I think the word itself has had a bad reputation, for lack of a better word, because it is when someone is vulnerable when they can “feel” or “think” they are defenseless. I would like to encourage you to believe that vulnerability does not mean powerless. Vulnerability can take you to greater heights in being able to understand others in a way that some perhaps may not. You will only be defenseless if that’s what you believe and if you give your power away just because life threw something at you that you were not prepare for.

Now on to the kind of vulnerability that is not good. Vulnerability is not good when that puts you in a position where you no longer validate yourself. When you need others to validate you constantly because you feel powerless, that’s a problem. Trauma, childhood issues, abuse, depression, anxiety, none of this need to make you powerless. You are a beautiful being, made to perfection even with your imperfections and made with a purpose.

Vulnerability is not good when you give someone the power to make the decisions for you, to tell you what is right for you or anything of that sort. YOU have the power to make your own right decisions. YOU are the only one who truly knows what is right for you. Others can help lead you to your own path and help you figure it out on your own but if you need someone else to lead you rather than you lead yourself, this kind of vulnerability is not good.

Vulnerability is not good when you allow mistreatment from others. When you are not aware of other people’s mistreatment because you are too “vulnerable” to realize this, this is a major problem. Yes, as human beings we need love, to be needed and to belong but it should never be at the price of our self-esteem. It’s too expensive to lose your peace of mind, dignity and self-love.

Vulnerability…..it’s one of those topics that must be discussed since it affects our well-being but we determine how we let it affect us. It can affect us in a positive way if we allow ourselves to grow from the experience or it can affect us in a negative way, allowing it to rob our self-worth, our power and our connection with ourselves.

This is my longest blog post yet and it was because of that disturbing article I read that I needed to address this topic. If you are feeling vulnerable at this moment, I would like to please encourage you to utilize your vulnerability for growth, not for self-destruction. It’s necessary for “bad” things to happen because we can grow from it and be better because of it. Of course, I quote the word bad because this word can mean different things for different people. It is with the intention of helping you view vulnerability in a lighter light that I write this blog post.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez. I now have a YouTube channel which I will ask that you subscribe for more tips to increase your well-being https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLZANKeRUFM4YvMXy4HzQrg.

 

You Are NOT Damaged Goods So Don’t Treat Yourself Like So

This post I want to dedicate it to anyone who has been badly bruised by someone, who has “made” them feel inadequate, wrong, or anything that is negative. My purpose with today’s post is for you not to allow anything or anyone make you become damaged goods because once you allow this, this is like catching the flu, only that it can take a really long time to heal.

How can we become damaged goods unintentionally? We can become damaged goods when we allow other people’s issues to become our issues. We can become damaged goods when we give so much to the point that we have nothing left for ourselves. This last thing can make us feel unworthy when those actions, we perceive, are not reciprocated. We can become damaged goods when we don’t learn from our past relationships and experiences. We can become damaged goods when carry negative feelings because of a perceived rejection. One thing I must say that the universe has lovingly taught me is that rejection is not a rejection, it is protection.

Others may do things that we may not understand why they do them. First and foremost, that is not your problem and it is not for you to try to figure out why they did it in the first place. Yes, analysis of a situation is a must so that we can grow. However, investing your time trying to figure out why someone did something when you did nothing wrong to them will only create issues for you that you have no business having in the first place.

Almost 99% of the time what others say and do is a direct reflection of the way they feel and think about themselves. This is because we only offer what we have inside and because we are the ones responsible for the way we decide to perceive and react toward a situation. No one else is but us. This means that you are not responsible for the way someone decides to speak or behave, so then this can help alleviate some of the pressure of trying so hard to impress or please others. Now, I would like to clarify that this does NOT give you permission to speak or treat others in a disrespectful manner because they “are responsible for the way they react to a situation”. At all times we have to be mindful of our actions and have compassion and empathy for others.

When you have done nothing wrong to someone who has done you wrong, you can have the peace of mind that from your end you are good. You have no regrets, nothing to worry about in terms of you hurting others. Therefore, don’t carry that hurt and anger with you. Those negative feelings that you carry as a result of someone else’s actions is only hurting you, not the other person.

You deserve to be in peace with what you do in life. You deserve to feel free to be yourself. You deserve to carry only the responsibility of your actions and your life. You will feel all this if you liberate yourself from the feelings that other people’s actions have caused. Remember that people reflect who they are inside, how they think and feel about themselves and their life. It is not your responsibility to change others but it is your responsibility to change yourself for the better.

As you can read, becoming damaged goods can be quite easy but it is up to us not to become damaged goods. I would like to encourage you with today’s post that if you haven’t done so, work through any issues that a situation, a relationship or the past has created in you. You are NOT damaged goods nor should you allow anything to make you become a damaged good.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

 

Become an Asset

On today’s post, I would like to encourage you to do one thing that if you don’t get anything else from this blog, this is one thing that you must do that can dramatically change every area of your life and that is to become an asset.

That’s right! For so many of us it is easy to blame other things, people or situations for our shortcomings, our “failures” whether that be in relationships, money, etc. However, none of this helps. All this does is continue the cycle of misery, frustration and dissatisfaction. I find that the best way to overcome shortcomings, misery, frustration and attracting the wrong things over and over again is by becoming an asset.

Become an asset by working on every area of your life. This means that you work on becoming a better self in every way you can- mentally, emotionally, spiritually and physically. So how can you start becoming an asset and in what areas am I referring to?

Become an asset to your family! Everything starts at home. Ensuring that you become the best mother, father, brother, sister, cousin, etc. will help create a very healthy home. This means that you work on being the best version of yourself because you understand that you are a role model for other family members. So make sure you are a good role model to yourself first so you can be a great role model to others.

Become an asset to your husband/wife or companion! You do this by making sure you are in harmony with yourself because you can only offer what you have. This means that you work on any issue you may have, so if you have any hurt or if you are broken, you work towards becoming whole. What constitutes healthy relationships are two whole people. If you realize that you need professional help in order to heal, then go seek that help. You are worth the investment.

Become an asset at work! Always do your best to acquire new skills so that you can have more to add to the work that you do. Do your best to always be grateful for the job that you have. Always strive to be a great coworker for your fellow work colleagues.

Become an asset for your friends! Do this by always striving to make yourself happy so you have more joy to offer to your friends. Always take care of yourself so that you can be that example to your friends. Always strive to be grateful for all you have as a person.

Become an asset to yourself! Yes, you read right. You have to be an asset to yourself. You do this by taking care of your whole body. This means taking care of your mindset, of your spirit and your physical body. This means stating positive affirmations to yourself, doing things that you love, being more loving towards yourself and always striving for happiness. This also means taking yourself away from situations that don’t serve you. This last thing I wrote is a form of love because you don’t allow yourself to be in situations that are harmful to you.

Becoming an asset is about making the effort and taking responsibility for your life. This is crucial to your overall well-being. It all starts with a decision so make a decision to choose yourself first and become an asset.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

Build Organ Reserve

What happened to me this passed weekend made me value the way I have been taking care of my body. I flew with some people who were throwing up, four to be exact, and one of them had the flu. Of course the person with the flu I was in contact with since she was at my side and she came close to me to tell me she had the flu. The following day I woke up feeling so drained that I was worried about traveling. I still flew out that night but by the time I was landing at the destination, I was feeling some body ache and was feeling cold. I honestly didn’t know how I was going to survive the trip since I was also having a headache.

When I came back to NY, my body was able to bounce back the following day and I thank God for that. I must say that was pretty quick. I know that is because of my organ reserve and it is this that I would like to write about.

I came across the term “organ reserve” while working on getting my credits for the requalification of my certification in Holistic Nutrition. What organ reserve means is that the organs have the capacity to allow the body to deal with stress through unused, extra functioning abilities. I compare this to savings. There will be times in life when financially you may be in a position where you will have to use your savings because times are tough. Organ reserve is like your savings account but just like you need to put money aside so that you can have for a rainy day, you have to build organ reserve so in times of stress, your body can cope and bounce right back up with no problem.

So how can you start building organ reserve? You start by starting NOW. Don’t wait until tomorrow, next week, next month or until the summer time. No, start NOW taking care of your body. This care, of course, will consist of eating healthy and taking the proper supplements that your body needs. The one mistake that many may make is thinking that they can have all their nutrition through food. Sorry but food is not grown the same way anymore and so many nutrients can be lost from the passage of time of the harvest to the cooking. Besides, I don’t think many of us, I include myself, eat the amount of foods that we need in order to get the amount of nutrients the body needs so that it can function at an optimum level. So make sure you supplement what you eat by choosing the right supplements. Being physically active also helps and to be physically active doesn’t mean doing hardcore workouts. It can be as simple as going for a brisk walk.

Make sure that mentally and emotionally you are right. When your mind isn’t right, nothing can be right. Now, I know that this can be a challenge at times. Trust me, I know, but it is a must to make an effort to be fit mentally and emotionally. Understand what drains you. Understand what triggers certain emotions in you. Do what feels good for you. Remember, you are an investment that you must make but you are worth the investment.

If you ever think for a moment that your body is just this thing that gets hungry every 2 1/2 to 3 hours and it isn’t something to truly treasure, think of what happens when you have no savings. When things really go sour, you have no cushion to fall back on. Well, same thing with your body. You want a cushion to fall back on and organ reserve is that cushion in times of stress. So I encourage you to start working on creating some organ reserve. If you need some help with that, you are more than welcome to contact me on this site.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

 

 

Las diferentes maneras de ser saludable

Creo que todos nosotros sabemos que es importante el ser físicamente saludable. Esta es la parte más visible de uno, haciendo obvio el estilo de vida que tenemos. Aunque es importante el cuidar de nuestro cuerpo, hay otras maneras de ser saludable que es igualmente importante sino más importante ya que cuando estas partes de uno no están saludables, el cuerpo físico también sufre. Es importante ser saludable mental y emocionalmente y de eso voy a escribir hoy.

Primero quisiera escribir cómo puede saber cuando no está saludable mental y emocionalmente. Una de las maneras más sencillas es mirando a su alrededor. ¿Su vida refleja lo que merece? ¿Qué tipo de relaciones tiene con los demás? ¿Qué clase de relación tiene consigo mismo? ¿Tiene usted alguna relación que es destructiva e insalubre en su vida? ¿Cómo usted se siente mayormente? Todas estas preguntas son indicaciones de cómo está su estado mental y emocional.

En otras palabras, si usted bloquea su propia felicidad, si usted vive con miedo, si es pesimista, si usted aleja las cosas y personas buenas, si vive en el pasado y es un pasado doloroso, si permite negatividad, entonces usted no está saludable mental y emocionalmente.

Lo que muchos no se dan cuenta es que siempre y cuando usted pone una curita a una herida grande o ignora los problemas reales que tiene, usted NUNCA podrá alcanzar la verdadera felicidad. La felicidad verdadera viene de lidiar con sus problemas cuando sus problemas lo previenen de las cosas buenas en la vida. Sí, es difícil abrir esa maleta y ver todo lo que tiene y botar aquello que no necesita pero es ahí cuando se tiene que preguntar si vale la pena cargar con una maleta pesada.

¿Qué quiere decir el ser mental y emocionalmente saludable? Quiere decir sentirse bien sobre usted mismo y de su vida, aceptar la abundancia, aceptar y permitir la felicidad, saber que usted es merecedor, saber que usted merece ser amado bien por los demás, permitir personas quienes lo ayuden a crecer y quienes realmente lo aman. Es mentalmente tener la capacidad de dejar ir aquellas cosas, situaciones o personas que no le sirven. Es el no estresarse por las cosas que no valen la pena. Es enfocarse más en las cosas positivas que en las negativas. Es hacer lo posible para desarollar la agilidad mental y emocional para poder levantarse después de una desilución. El ser emocionalmente saludable es poder amarse aún cuando los demás no lo aman. El perdonarse por sus propios errores y el aceptarse a si mismo aún cuando los demás no lo aceptan. Es el usted amarse más que a cualquier otra cosa. Este acto de amor es necesario ya que es este tipo de amor lo que lo previene de permitir situaciones, cosas o personas quienes no lo hacen sentir bien.

El ser físicamente saludable sin duda es importante pero uno no puede olvidar qué extremadamente importante es el ser saludable también mental y emocionalmente. Cuando mental y emocionalmente usted no está bien, no hay manera de estar bien físicamente ya que estas tres partes están conectadas. Si usted siente que su vida no es de la manera que usted desea, lo animo a que mire estas dos partes de usted y si necesita intervención, entonces vea un terapeuta o psicólogo. Esto en una inversión que usted hace en usted mismo y usted vale la inversión. Su mente y emociones son bienes que tiene que cuidar, por lo tanto, asegúrese de que usted haga lo que puede para que estas partes estén saludables.

Si a usted le gusta el blog, usted de seguro le gustará el libro Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve en donde escribo temas que impactan enormemente su bienestar que quizás usted no ha estado al pendiente. Este libro está disponible sólo en inglés pero estoy trabajando en la versión en español. Puede obtener su copia en Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness o en Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220822.

Usted puede leer el blog en su Kindle haciendo clic en la tienda Amazon Kindle en https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 y puede escuchar mis pláticas en la red en http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

“De una manera u otra todo se resolverá”

El mes pasado ha sido un mes estremadamente estresante. La última vez que estuve tan estresada fue cuando mi papá estaba muy enfermo pero este estrés, lo cual fue a causa de mis metas que he tenido, de seguro no es un estrés saludable. Esto me trajo tanto acné a mi cara, tanto que no he visto en tanto tiempo y un decaimiento del cuerpo hace dos semanas atrás, lo cual me llevó a estar en la cama todo el día. Constantemente oía una voz diciendome, “de una manera u otra todo se resolverá” y si yo hubiese escuchado esa voz, no creo que hubiese llegado a ese nivel de estrés. Es esto lo que me gustaría animarlo con lo que escribo…que no importa qué usted esté tratando de lograr o qué necesite terminar, de una manera u otra todo se resolverá.

De una manera u otra todo se resolverá, por lo tanto, no vale la pena estresarse. ¿Para qué? ¿Para estresar su cuerpo innecesariamente? ¿Para subir su presión sanguínea innecesariamente? ¿Para poner su mente mal? No importa cuántas metas usted tenga, nada es más preciado que su cuerpo, por lo tanto es necesario relajarse y pensar que todo se resolverá.

De una manera u otra todo se resolverá, por lo tanto, no tiene sentido preocuparse. El preocuparse le roba su energía al punto que lo paraliza. Es una energía baja, entonces esto de seguro no lo llevará adonde usted quiere ir. El preocuparse le roba de su agilidad mental y emocional, lo cual usted necesita cuando tiene mucho que hacer.

De una manera u otra todo se resolverá…si usted siempre tiene esta frase presente en su mente, esto lo ayudará a disminuir cualquier emoción negativa que pueda sentir a causa de las presiones que pueda tener. Mientras usted se enfoque en el resultado final, lo que sea que usted quiera hacer, usted verá el resultado de su esfuerzo.

De una manera u otra todo se resolverá…una frase poderosa, créalo o no y una manera de entrenar su mente y cuerpo a no estresarse por las presiones de la vida. Usted no fue creado para estar estresado a tal punto de enfermarse. Disfrute de todo lo que tenga que hacer, hasta las cosas que no son tan plasenteras- todo esto es parte del camino de convertirse en la persona que usted fue creado a ser.

Si a usted le gusta el blog, usted de segura le gustará el libro Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve en donde escribo temas que impactan enormemente su bienestar que quizás usted no ha estado al pendiente. Este libro está disponible sólo en inglés pero estoy trabajando en la versión en español. Puede obtener su copia en Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness o en Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220822.

Usted puede leer el blog en su Kindle haciendo clic en la tienda Amazon Kindle en https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 y puede escuchar mis pláticas en la red en http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

Don’t Use That Crutch

My wish for this new year is for you to start the new year with a bam. It is my wish that you have a great year and have the best well-being ever. However, in order to have this, mentally and emotionally you must be right. It is for this reason that I start of this year by suggesting you not to use that crutch.

Crutches are for when one has an injury and needs to use a crutch in order to lean on to move forward or move anywhere. That is the ONLY time you should be using a crutch. Other than that all you will be doing is making yourself more handicap by continuously using something that you no longer need.

The key phrase in the word “crutch” is to lean on. I emphasize this because that is what we sometimes do in life- we use things or others as crutches in order to move on, making ourselves handicap. I’ve said before and I will continuously say and write that the worse handicap is the one of the mind. I would like to add that another kind of handicap which is just as bad is being emotionally handicapped but this I will reserve for another post. Having things or others as crutches is terribly detrimental to your overall well-being and this is what I will be discussing.

Using others as crutches is detrimental to your mental and emotional well-being. It makes you a slave of that other person by attaching some sort of value to the other person that can sometimes undermine your own value. This can make you not realize your own potential, your own capacity to get certain things done and you hinder yourself from seeing how much power you have. It is also detrimental to the relationship. It hurts the relationship because by using someone as a crutch, you accidentally become like a leech, sucking the life out of the other person. This kind of behavior makes you push others away unintentionally. There needs to be balance in a relationship and in order for there to be a healthy relationship, two people need to be whole. A relationship where one is a crutch means one person is not whole.

Using things as crutches, again, it makes you a slave to those things. Part of achieving a great well-being is not having any attachment to things. The best and healthiest attachment to have is with oneself. Again, just like using someone as a crutch hinders you from seeing your own power, so does using things as crutches. It is important to know that no one can help you move forward if you don’t move forward yourself.

Crutches, the wrong crutches I would like to emphasize, rob you of your power. They hinder you from seeing what you are made up of. They mentally and emotionally make you handicapped. In order to be whole you must release those crutches that you have been holding on to and know that it is YOU who makes your life happen.

You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez