What Do Loving Behaviors Look Like?

In today’s post, I want to discuss something that is very much needed because whether we realize it or not, the behaviors that others have toward us and the treatment that we allow from others can affect our well-being in a very indirect way. So in today’s post, I would like to discuss what are some behaviors and treatments that you NEED to allow because these are loving behaviors- the ONLY behaviors that you need to allow.

There are many ways in which someone can mistreat us that goes beyond verbal, physical, mental and emotional abuse. It is the following behaviors that you need to be aware of and mindful because it is the “small” things that are not so small which can eat up and chip away your self-esteem without you even realizing it. Mistreatment can come in the form of disrespect of space, self, time and keeping things in a superficial level. The problem with the last thing I wrote, “keeping things in a superficial level” is that this doesn’t allow for a deeper, more meaningful bond which is what provides nutrients to our soul.

So now that I wrote some of the things that are forms of mistreatment, I would like to write about its opposite. Loving behaviors from others come in the form of being respectful of who you are. What I mean with this is that the person doesn’t judge you for being who you are. The person truly accepts you for who you are. The person sees your value as a human being and treats you like so. The person makes you feel comfortable and good about who you are. Being around that person feels like a very nutritious meal that feels satisfying and healthy. It is with those kinds of people that you should be cultivating relationships with.

Loving behaviors from others come in the form of them respecting your time. People that want to be in your life don’t ask to be in your life, they just are. These are people that make the time to be with you and spend time with you. When they do spend time with you, you are not their plan B, you are their plan A. These are people that when they say they will contact you to see you, they do so. These are not people that keep you hanging, on the contrary, they want to make sure that you have set the time aside to be with them. They are mindful of your time to leave you hanging and not let you know of your plans together.

Loving behaviors from others come in the form of respecting your space. They respect the fact that you need time for you. You need time to cultivate you. You need your space to center yourself and for you to be right with you. They respect the fact that you have your own ways and that those ways are to be respected. For instance, perhaps in the morning you are not much of a talker because you need time to wake up. The person respects that about you that they are not just thinking about how they function that they invade that space of yours of you needed some time to wake up a bit. This is just an example to illustrate what I mean with space and this is just one form of space. Space can be defined in other ways as well.

For the purpose of this blog, I will break down this topic into different blog posts just so I don’t make this blog post very long. There are many ways to show loving behaviors that this in and of itself can become a chapter rather than a blog post. I just wanted to show you in a general sense what loving behaviors look like because these are the ONLY behaviors that we all need to be accepting from others. Accepting anything less than this only chips your self-esteem and self-concept, reducing you to believing that others can treat you however way they want and subconsciously placing you in the category of being an “option”. You are NOT an option, therefore, don’t ever reduce yourself to anyone treating you this way.

With today’s post, I want to encourage you to pay attention to the way others are treating you. How are you allowing others to treat you? If those in your personal space are not showing loving behaviors, it’s time to reconsider and do some spring cleaning of relationships in your life.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

 

Not Loving Yourself Is Expensive

Since we are in the month of love, I would like to write about how expensive it is to not love yourself.

I can tell you from personal experience that it has cost me a lot to not love myself in the past. It has cost me my peace, my self-esteem, my value, among other things. What many of us sometimes fail to realize is that loving ourselves is crucial to that foundation of well-being.

Not loving yourself costs you your peace in the sense that when you don’t love yourself, you will most likely settle for situations that rob you of your peace. You will choose things that are not in alignment with who you truly are. You will choose things, situations and people that only feed the negative feelings you may have about yourself and your life.

Not loving yourself makes you blind as to your own blind spots. It doesn’t allow you to see the role that you are playing in your own life and what is contributing to the negative things in your life. It can make you prone to becoming a victim to situations that you perhaps create for yourself. It doesn’t allow you to look within for self-empowerment.

Not loving yourself hurts and eats away your self-esteem. It makes you choose relationships that are far below from what you deserve. It makes you remain in situations that you need to leave and tolerate things that one must never tolerate. It also makes you attract things that are in the same vibrational energy as you are in- meaning that if you don’t feel highly about yourself, you will attract others that feel the same way. You can always tell when this is the case based on how a person treats you, speaks to you, and makes you feel.

Not loving yourself diminishes your value. What adds value to you is you. You are the one who determines your worth and how others will treat you. You do play a role in how others will perceive you. When you don’t love yourself, this is when you mistakenly believe that you are not worthy of genuine love, of kindness and respect. Because you can’t see your own value, you hinder others from seeing your value as well.

Not loving yourself can lead to feelings of depression, unworthiness, anxiety, among other things. Life is not about this. You were designed to feel loved, to be loved, to feel happiness, to live in your knowing of your value and to grow into a healthy, fulfilled individual. However, none of this can be accomplished without loving yourself.

As you can read, not loving yourself is very expensive and not worth paying that big of a price. Anything that contributes to you not loving yourself, please get rid of it. Anything that doesn’t make you feel loved, appreciated and accepted are not worth your time nor energy. Start placing more value in yourself. Start seeing your beauty. Start seeing what makes you unique and wonderful and you will be at the start of loving yourself and if you do already, you will be loving yourself even more.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez. I now have a YouTube channel which I will ask that you subscribe for more tips to increase your well-being https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLZANKeRUFM4YvMXy4HzQrg.

 

How Your Definition of Beauty Ties In With Your Well-being

One may not think that the definition of beauty is very much tied to one’s well-being since when one thinks of well-being/wellness, it is inevitable to think about nutrition and working out. However, this one definition can influence your well-being either for better or for worse. If your definition of beauty is hurting you rather than helping you, then it’s time for you to change your concept of beauty.

Our self-concept and self-esteem are very much tied to the way we feel and think about ourselves physically. It is because of this that your definition of beauty can either hurt you or help you. But first, let’s discuss what being beautiful means.

Beauty comes in all shapes, sizes and colors and thank God for this. It is these differences that make life so interesting. It is these differences that make us all fit with someone or some group. The different spices that we have in our pantry are what keep our food delicious with unique flavors. This is the same thing when it comes to people.

I am also aware that many of us want what we don’t have. Those who have curly hair wish they had straight hair and vice versa. Those who may be short wish they were a bit taller, well that’s not my case because I love my height. What I may lack in height I have in abundance in other things. This is exactly how you have to view whatever it is that you don’t have. Whatever it is that you “lack”, you have in abundance in other ways, whether that be intelligence, charisma, etc.

So with this said, what is your definition of beauty? If your definition of beauty consists of things that you don’t have or lack, then I encourage you to reconsider your definition of beauty because if this continues on, this can greatly affect the way you see yourself. Trust, know and learn to see several things about you that are beautiful. Everyone has their own beauty and this, in and of itself, is beautiful! Beauty doesn’t consist of having straight, long hair, or clear skin or whatever the color of your skin.

One thing I can’t leave out of this post is never, EVER allow anyone to define for you what is beautiful. Never EVER allow anyone to define you. The moment you allow this to happen, you allow that person to take control of the way you view and feel about yourself and that is a big no no.

The definition of beauty….is one to look into if you notice that you don’t find yourself pretty enough or handsome enough or good enough. You are MORE than pretty enough, MORE than handsome enough, MORE than good enough. If you don’t think this way, it’s time for you to check what your definition of beauty is.

You can read this blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

Are You a Liability to Yourself?

Many times we don’t have the life that we want, we don’t feel as great as we are capable of feeling and we don’t reach our fullest potential not because we are not deserving of all the things that we want but because we are our own liability.

The meaning of liability is something that can cause a disadvantage. So with this said, when you are your own liability, you put yourself in a disadvantage in the sense that you yourself cause your own misfortunes, your own failures, your disappointments, etc.

You are probably wondering “how so?”. Well, there are many ways to be your own liability. You can do this through your own beliefs. If you deep down inside don’t believe you are worthy, don’t think you are enough, don’t think that you are capable, these beliefs hinder you of the very thing that you want. This is something to be dealt with ASAP since not dealing with one’s own beliefs can keep recreating what it is that you don’t want.

You do this through your thoughts, whether these are thoughts about yourself or thoughts about your life. This can kind of be related to your beliefs but with thoughts, think about what it is that you think on a daily basis. Your thoughts do influence your emotions.

You can be your own liability by the things that you allow in your life. What kind of messages are you allowing in? What kind of relationships are you allowing in your life? What kind of environments are you choosing to be a part of? What kind of labels are you allowing? You can truly become what you allow.

What kind of shape are you emotionally? We are driven by our emotions. We make decisions based on our emotions. When emotionally we are not right, we won’t have the capacity to make decisions with clarity. When emotionally we are not right, we open the doors to bad things to come into our life.

When you come to the realization that you are your own liability, it is a must to get help. Sometimes it is hard to do this on our own and that is when it is a must to reach out to someone who can help. This is for your own good as well as the good of your own well-being.

You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

REFUSE!

Refuse! This is a bold word to use but it is a word, a verb, a statement that I think is a must if you want to have great well-being in your life. How so is what I will be discussing in today’s post.

It is just my belief that in today’s society we are being conditioned to think that life is just the way it is- we get sick, it’s just the way it is. We get divorced, it’s just the way it is. We are very tired, it’s just the way it is. Lack of money, it’s just the way it is. Life just is the way it is. Although things do happen in life, I refuse to believe life just is the way it is.

Having the privilege to learn more about our body and nutrition has opened up my eyes so much about many things. Despite the fact that there are times that diseases may “creep in”, your body is just so perfect and I refuse to believe that disease is just a part of life. Refuse to believe that being tired is normal! Refuse to believe that the older you get it’s just normal for your body to have aches and pain! Refuse to believe that the body just deteriorates as you get older! Refuse!

Understanding how complex our mind can be but yet how simple we are at the same time, I do believe it just takes very little for us to either be extremely happy or to be on the other end of that. Yet it seems like there are more and more who are feeling sad or frustrated or even angry with life or with others. When this is the case, it may be tempting to believe that perhaps it’s normal to feel frustrated or angry that maybe it’s just the way life is nowadays. You are designed to have love, be in love and to be surrounded by love. You are designed to be happy even though life may throw challenges in your way but overall you are meant to be happy. Refuse to be depressed! Refuse to having a loveless life! Refuse to feel angry all the time! Refuse to constantly feel stressed! Refuse to live a life that you don’t like!

Oh love! Something we can’t be without and yet when it comes to romantic love, it seems as if it is something complicated at times and hard to find. What is even sad is that what we tend to see in society just feeds this negative notion that one may have in regards to romantic love. When being “rejected”, one may feel tempted to believe that perhaps love is not for them, I know this feeling very well, and this is not so. Rejection is a whole other topic that I will be writing about in a near future. For now once again, refuse to live a loveless life! Refuse to believe that love is not for you! Refuse to allow “rejection” to bring you down! You are meant to be in love and surrounded by love.

Refuse, ah, what a powerful word, verb and statement- one that I encourage you to use in this powerful way if you want to achieve great well-being without being bitter, sad or angry because of what occurs in life.

You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at http://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

Make Your Own Vows

Today, the day after my birthday, I had a voice inside me advice me of certain things which I know was my intuition and it’s something that I would like to share with you. I feel like sharing this because I think these things that my intuition is advising me are things that we should all be doing on a daily bass. Here it goes…

“Aura, from this day forward, I want you to make several vows because life is too beautiful and awfully short to be focusing on all the things that are not serving you. I want you to make a vow to focus more on yourself. Do more of the things that make you happy. Focus on making yourself happy because that is your main responsibility. Take care of your health no matter what. Focus on those who truly love you and forget those who couldn’t see your value. Let go of those who hurt you and love more those who love you. Let go of your fears. You can’t live on fear since fear paralyzes you. Be more of who you are. And since your relationships mean so much to you, again, let go of those who can’t see your value and focus and love those who do. Make this promise to yourself, please.”

This is the kind of vow that we all need to make to ourselves. To your vows you can add whatever it is that you know you need to work on more in your life. We make vows to our spouse and loved ones but many times we may fail to make that vow to ourselves. I personally know what it’s like to struggle with certain issues and I can tell you that not learning how to deal with them can hinder you from your best. I know what it is like to allow your fear to take over. This stops you from fully growing. I also know what it is like to focus on the wrong things and people. Those that are meant to be in your life will have the capacity to see you exactly for who you are and still stay in your life.

I share this with you because I want to challenge you to make your own vows and to commit to them because committing to your own vows can add tremendously to your well-being. Well-being doesn’t start with anything or anybody else. It starts with you.

You can read this blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at http://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

Two Ingredients That Can’t Be Missing When It Comes to Your Well-being

Well-being is comprised of many different things that all add up to our balance and happiness in life. Just like in a cake there are certain ingredients that can NOT be missing because otherwise the cake won’t be a cake, there are two ingredients that can NOT be missing if you are to have true happiness and balance in life and they are courage and self-love.

You can not be without courage when it comes to well-being because great things in life requires courage. No matter what it is that you may want in life- have your own home, be married, have kids, move to another state, lose weight, have your own business- all this requires courage. It requires courage because fear may kick, because self-doubt will creep in, because your old habits will want to kick in and you will want to stay in your old ways. The problem with staying with your old ways is that your old ways won’t lead to happiness if you are unhappy where you are. This will just make you more unhappy, fueling the sense of being stuck and of frustration. Lack of courage leads you to live a life that you don’t want. It allows fear and self-doubt to dominate your life. It conditions your mind to thinking that what you want isn’t possible and this paralyzes you. When you are mentally paralyzed because of lack of courage, you prevent your own growth and growth is essential to your well-being.

Self-love is another ingredient that can not be missing because it is this kind of love that will determine everything in your life. It is self-love that will not allow someone to disrespect you or mistreat you because you know you deserve better. It is self-love that will help you attract loving people in your life because that is what you will be expecting from others. Self-love is what allows you to do loving things to yourself. Self-love is what allows you to place yourself in situations that are uplifting to you. Self-love is truly the basis for everything. When you don’t love yourself, you do the opposite of all that I just wrote. You allow mistreatment from others because you feel either that is all that you deserve or that is all you can get. Because of lack of self-love, you lower your standards just to be accepted and loved by others. Lack of self-love leads to you entering in relationships that compromise your well-being. So as you can read, self-love is an ingredient that can not be missing when it comes to your well-being.

If one is lacking in either courage or self-love or in both, the best thing to do is to exercise these muscles. You need to exercise your courage and self-love muscles one day at a time and be patient with yourself because just as the muscles in the body takes time to tone up and get in shape, so will your courage and self-love muscles will take time to build. If you need to take baby steps then start with something small but that still challenges you so that you can exercise that courage muscle. Start by doing something loving just for yourself so that you can start exercising that self-love muscle. Take it a day at a time and slowly but surely these two muscles will build and be strong. It is here that you start laying the foundation to your well-being.

You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at http://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.