Why Selfishness Is Necessary

Like anything in life, everything can be good or bad, it all depends on the context in which it is in and the degree in which it is used. In today’s blog post, I would like to discuss something that perhaps for some it may seem as if I’m promoting something that is narcissistic but on the contrary, it is one key ingredient for your overall well-being.

Flight Attendants instruct passenger during the safety video to first adjust their mask before helping others. This is because how in the world can you help someone else if you first don’t help yourself? It’s impossible to help someone else if you first are not helping yourself. It is impossible to serve others when you don’t serve yourself first.

You can only give what you have. So if you want to give the best of you, you have to give the best to yourself. To do this, you need to have some degree of selfishness. The kind of selfishness that I am referring to is not the one where you only think of yourself and no one else. The one that I am referring to is the one where you think of your well-being first. It’s the kind of selfishness where you think of what makes you happy first. It’s the one where you have healthy boundaries for yourself and for others. Yes, even you need healthy boundaries for yourself! This is because many times we can be our own worst enemies.

Being selfish allows you to fill your cup first. You can’t serve from an empty jar, same thing if you are empty yourself. You have nothing to offer to others and so to serve others you need to serve yourself. This is what will allow you to give to others because you have in abundance.

Being selfish allows you to take care of yourself first by meeting your own needs. When you meet your needs, you are good. You feel taken care of. You feel great. You feel loved. Feeling loved, full and taken care of is so basic to your overall well-being. As adults, it’s important to remember that it is us who are responsible for our well-being. When we take care of our own responsibilities, this is when we will be able to be better versions of ourselves.

Being selfish allows you the space to think of yourself first. In today’s world, we are wrongly taught that thinking only of ourselves is bad. We were not designed to be of service for others at the cost of our well-being. No! Yes, it’s important to serve others as long as it is not hurting our well-being. For this, we need that space to think of ourselves first. It is from this position that you will be of greater service to others because there won’t be any resentment or hurt feelings in the long run.

So being selfish doesn’t have to be a bad thing. It can actually be a beautiful thing but it depends on your perspective of it. If you find yourself thinking and feeling that being selfish is wrong, think about whether not being selfish is hurting you in any way. If it is, then I encourage you to reconsider your thoughts on being selfish.  This one change in perspective can make a tremendous difference in your overall well-being.

I would like to invite you to take the FREE course I created called The Path to Your Nirvana™, which is a 28 day course with 5 steps meant to help you live your own happiness by understanding first what is getting in the way of you being on your own path of happiness, how to overcome it, learning to understand your actions and focus and getting you to the path that your true essence has in store for you. There is a free bonus course with this course so it’s something for you to take advantage of. All you have to do is click on the link https://bit.ly/2uDS9Oo, put your name and email address.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez. I now have a YouTube channel which I will ask that you subscribe for more tips to increase your well-being https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLZANKeRUFM4YvMXy4HzQrg.

And if you would like to bring even more nature into your home, you can do what I do when I need a pick-me-up o when I have a headache, etc. and use the following oils that help me have more balance in life and I’m sure it will help you as well. http://my.doterra.com/Auraemartinez. You can also contact me so that I can help you choose the oils that will best help you.

 

 

 

 

Why a Healthy Dose of Selfishness Is Necessary?

Ahhhh selfishness. We were taught at a young age not to be selfish. It seems nowadays that we are taking this selfishness way out of hand to the point that it is being taken to the extreme where some don’t take at all in consideration other people. Since when has selfishness been taken out of context?!

The truth is that for your well-being, a healthy dose of selfishness is necessary. I dare to say it is not only necessary for you but for others as well. If you don’t take care of yourself first, you can’t take care of others. Flight Attendants show passengers on their safety demo that in case of a decompression, don your oxygen mask FIRST before helping others. Notice how I capitalized the word first. This is to put emphasis on how you need to help yourself first. This is because unless you help yourself first, you can’t help others.

The kind of selfishness that I am referring to here is not the kind where it is all about you and only you. It is not the one where you don’t care at all about others. It is not the one where you disregard others completely. This is NOT to be taken to the extreme.

The healthy dose of selfishness that I am referring to here is the one where you take your emotions into consideration. You don’t do things that don’t feel right to you just to make others feel good. A healthy dose of selfishness takes your mental state into consideration. For instance, a situation that drives you insane, no matter how much you love the person or how much you want to be there for them, for your own good, you minimize your energy and time in the situation because you want to preserve your mental sanity. A healthy dose of selfishness takes into consideration your physical state. Anything that jeopardizes your physical state you avoid no matter what, or at least try to minimize whatever it is that jeopardizes your physical state.

We are taught to give, give, give but constant giving without receiving will wear you out so quickly. Not only that, you will be giving not from a place of love but from a place of obligation and this only leads to feelings of resentment and anger. In order to sincerely give, you must receive. And the first person you must receive from is you. You need you. You need you always!

If you don’t take care of your own basic needs, if you are not selfish enough to make sure your cup is more than full, as a matter of fact, it should be overflowing. That way you can give from the overflow. In this way you will not feel depleted energetically.

A healthy dose of selfishness is an act of love from yourself. It is also an act of love for others. Think about this, when you feel good, don’t you only want to give good to others? When you are well taken care of, don’t you then feel better about taking care of others? When you are so in love, don’t you then see everything with eyes of love?

To get to this state, you need to do you. When you have a healthy dose of selfishness, this is exactly what you are giving yourself- the love, attention and care that you deserve. A healthy dose of selfishness will make your inner self feel taken care of, so you won’t feel any abandonment issues, no neglect, no resentment, no anger.

So if you have been neglecting yourself in any way, if you have been only taking care of others without you giving yourself the time to take care of you, I would like to invite you to have a healthy dose of selfishness. Start now taking care of your needs. Start now to listen to yourself. Start now to have this act of love for yourself. You deserve it.

I also would like to invite you to take the FREE course I created called The Path to Your Nirvana™, which is a 28 day course with 5 steps meant to help you live your own happiness by understanding first what is getting in the way of you being on your own path of happiness, how to overcome it, learning to understand your actions and focus and getting you to the path that your true essence has in store for you. There is a free bonus course with this course so it’s something for you to take advantage of. All you have to do is click on the link https://bit.ly/2QbBZW4, put your name, email address and select which language you would like the course.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez. I now have a YouTube channel which I will ask that you subscribe for more tips to increase your well-being https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLZANKeRUFM4YvMXy4HzQrg.

And if you would like to bring even more nature into your home, you can do what I do when I need a pick-me-up o when I have a headache, etc. and use the following oils that help me have more balance in life and I’m sure it will help you as well. http://my.doterra.com/Auraemartinez. You can also contact me so that I can help you choose the oils that will best help you.