Believe In Your Inner Reality

I feel so compelled to write about this in today’s blog because I am believing more and more that there are two kinds of realities in life- the outer reality and the inner reality. The conversations that I have had in these past days have been so enlightening for me and has proved to me that indeed there are two realities in life and that if we want to grow in well-being, we NEED to believe in our own inner reality and indeed ignore the outer reality.

We are indeed tempted to believe in our outer reality. We are tempted to believe that there is bad out there, that we can’t trust anyone, that love doesn’t exist anymore, that the older we get the more tired or sick we get. We are tempted to believe that the life we want, the house we want, the person that we want to be doesn’t exist. I’m here to tell you that all this are lies. Lies to hurt us. Lies to keep us down. Lies to shrink us. Lies to keep us from growing into all that we are capable and meant to be.

The moment we believe in these lies, the moment that we give into these lies is when those lies become a reality. Part of life is disappointments. Part of life is rejection. Part of life is hurt and thank god for all this! Why thank god? You probably think I’m nuts for this but the reason why you want to be thankful for all this is because all these things will lead you to growth. It leads you to knowing and understanding what you don’t want that will eventually lead you to the things that you do want.

Your inner reality is the one with the most power. It is the one that whether you realize or not, it dictates the actions that you take. How so? Whatever you think, you will subconsciously behave in ways that matches that what you think. Whatever you feel, you will subconsciously be lead to take actions that matches what you feel. Notice that when you feel sad, you feel like doing nothing, you feel like eating junk food, you most likely will have conversations that make you feel more down. All these things will just feed the emotion that you already feel, making it more intense and imprinting in your brain the reality that sadness is your reality. Notice that when you feel good, you start doing things that make you feel good. You feel like eating healthy. You naturally feel more energized which makes you radiate unto the eyes of others. All this with something as simple as feeling good. That’s how powerful our emotions are.

If you have the courage to believe in your inner reality, you will see that you already are and have all the things that you want. The reason why it isn’t a reality yet is because you may have some resistance to it and you don’t fully believe in the things you want. I have to admit, the biggest challenge is believing in your inner reality when the outer reality doesn’t seem to match. Regardless, it is CRUCIAL that you ignore your outer reality. Your current outer reality is a reflection of who you were in the past. You are experiencing the residual of your past. So your present is your past. I never fully understood this until I am now fully understanding its meaning.

Believe that you are that person that you know in your heart that you are. Believe you are a healthy person. Believe you have that house that you want. Believe you have that marriage that you want. You have to believe and stay away from conversations that contradict that inner reality. Stay away from people who have a negative undertone energy. Stay away from those who don’t believe in your dreams. Stay away from thoughts that make you sad. For the sake of this blog post, I will discuss in the next blog post how can you start to believe in your inner reality when your outer reality shows its opposite.

In the meantime, I would like to encourage you to believe. Start listening to music that uplifts you. Do things that make you feel good. Be around loving people. Know that you are love and that you are loved. Let’s start with that first and then on the next blog post, I can discuss how to believe in your inner reality. If you first start by feeling good, you will grow in well-being tremendously.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez. I now have a YouTube channel which I will ask that you subscribe for more tips to increase your well-being https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLZANKeRUFM4YvMXy4HzQrg.

 

 

What Do Loving Behaviors Look Like?

In today’s post, I want to discuss something that is very much needed because whether we realize it or not, the behaviors that others have toward us and the treatment that we allow from others can affect our well-being in a very indirect way. So in today’s post, I would like to discuss what are some behaviors and treatments that you NEED to allow because these are loving behaviors- the ONLY behaviors that you need to allow.

There are many ways in which someone can mistreat us that goes beyond verbal, physical, mental and emotional abuse. It is the following behaviors that you need to be aware of and mindful because it is the “small” things that are not so small which can eat up and chip away your self-esteem without you even realizing it. Mistreatment can come in the form of disrespect of space, self, time and keeping things in a superficial level. The problem with the last thing I wrote, “keeping things in a superficial level” is that this doesn’t allow for a deeper, more meaningful bond which is what provides nutrients to our soul.

So now that I wrote some of the things that are forms of mistreatment, I would like to write about its opposite. Loving behaviors from others come in the form of being respectful of who you are. What I mean with this is that the person doesn’t judge you for being who you are. The person truly accepts you for who you are. The person sees your value as a human being and treats you like so. The person makes you feel comfortable and good about who you are. Being around that person feels like a very nutritious meal that feels satisfying and healthy. It is with those kinds of people that you should be cultivating relationships with.

Loving behaviors from others come in the form of them respecting your time. People that want to be in your life don’t ask to be in your life, they just are. These are people that make the time to be with you and spend time with you. When they do spend time with you, you are not their plan B, you are their plan A. These are people that when they say they will contact you to see you, they do so. These are not people that keep you hanging, on the contrary, they want to make sure that you have set the time aside to be with them. They are mindful of your time to leave you hanging and not let you know of your plans together.

Loving behaviors from others come in the form of respecting your space. They respect the fact that you need time for you. You need time to cultivate you. You need your space to center yourself and for you to be right with you. They respect the fact that you have your own ways and that those ways are to be respected. For instance, perhaps in the morning you are not much of a talker because you need time to wake up. The person respects that about you that they are not just thinking about how they function that they invade that space of yours of you needed some time to wake up a bit. This is just an example to illustrate what I mean with space and this is just one form of space. Space can be defined in other ways as well.

For the purpose of this blog, I will break down this topic into different blog posts just so I don’t make this blog post very long. There are many ways to show loving behaviors that this in and of itself can become a chapter rather than a blog post. I just wanted to show you in a general sense what loving behaviors look like because these are the ONLY behaviors that we all need to be accepting from others. Accepting anything less than this only chips your self-esteem and self-concept, reducing you to believing that others can treat you however way they want and subconsciously placing you in the category of being an “option”. You are NOT an option, therefore, don’t ever reduce yourself to anyone treating you this way.

With today’s post, I want to encourage you to pay attention to the way others are treating you. How are you allowing others to treat you? If those in your personal space are not showing loving behaviors, it’s time to reconsider and do some spring cleaning of relationships in your life.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

 

You Are NOT Damaged Goods So Don’t Treat Yourself Like So

This post I want to dedicate it to anyone who has been badly bruised by someone, who has “made” them feel inadequate, wrong, or anything that is negative. My purpose with today’s post is for you not to allow anything or anyone make you become damaged goods because once you allow this, this is like catching the flu, only that it can take a really long time to heal.

How can we become damaged goods unintentionally? We can become damaged goods when we allow other people’s issues to become our issues. We can become damaged goods when we give so much to the point that we have nothing left for ourselves. This last thing can make us feel unworthy when those actions, we perceive, are not reciprocated. We can become damaged goods when we don’t learn from our past relationships and experiences. We can become damaged goods when carry negative feelings because of a perceived rejection. One thing I must say that the universe has lovingly taught me is that rejection is not a rejection, it is protection.

Others may do things that we may not understand why they do them. First and foremost, that is not your problem and it is not for you to try to figure out why they did it in the first place. Yes, analysis of a situation is a must so that we can grow. However, investing your time trying to figure out why someone did something when you did nothing wrong to them will only create issues for you that you have no business having in the first place.

Almost 99% of the time what others say and do is a direct reflection of the way they feel and think about themselves. This is because we only offer what we have inside and because we are the ones responsible for the way we decide to perceive and react toward a situation. No one else is but us. This means that you are not responsible for the way someone decides to speak or behave, so then this can help alleviate some of the pressure of trying so hard to impress or please others. Now, I would like to clarify that this does NOT give you permission to speak or treat others in a disrespectful manner because they “are responsible for the way they react to a situation”. At all times we have to be mindful of our actions and have compassion and empathy for others.

When you have done nothing wrong to someone who has done you wrong, you can have the peace of mind that from your end you are good. You have no regrets, nothing to worry about in terms of you hurting others. Therefore, don’t carry that hurt and anger with you. Those negative feelings that you carry as a result of someone else’s actions is only hurting you, not the other person.

You deserve to be in peace with what you do in life. You deserve to feel free to be yourself. You deserve to carry only the responsibility of your actions and your life. You will feel all this if you liberate yourself from the feelings that other people’s actions have caused. Remember that people reflect who they are inside, how they think and feel about themselves and their life. It is not your responsibility to change others but it is your responsibility to change yourself for the better.

As you can read, becoming damaged goods can be quite easy but it is up to us not to become damaged goods. I would like to encourage you with today’s post that if you haven’t done so, work through any issues that a situation, a relationship or the past has created in you. You are NOT damaged goods nor should you allow anything to make you become a damaged good.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

 

Not Loving Yourself Is Expensive

Since we are in the month of love, I would like to write about how expensive it is to not love yourself.

I can tell you from personal experience that it has cost me a lot to not love myself in the past. It has cost me my peace, my self-esteem, my value, among other things. What many of us sometimes fail to realize is that loving ourselves is crucial to that foundation of well-being.

Not loving yourself costs you your peace in the sense that when you don’t love yourself, you will most likely settle for situations that rob you of your peace. You will choose things that are not in alignment with who you truly are. You will choose things, situations and people that only feed the negative feelings you may have about yourself and your life.

Not loving yourself makes you blind as to your own blind spots. It doesn’t allow you to see the role that you are playing in your own life and what is contributing to the negative things in your life. It can make you prone to becoming a victim to situations that you perhaps create for yourself. It doesn’t allow you to look within for self-empowerment.

Not loving yourself hurts and eats away your self-esteem. It makes you choose relationships that are far below from what you deserve. It makes you remain in situations that you need to leave and tolerate things that one must never tolerate. It also makes you attract things that are in the same vibrational energy as you are in- meaning that if you don’t feel highly about yourself, you will attract others that feel the same way. You can always tell when this is the case based on how a person treats you, speaks to you, and makes you feel.

Not loving yourself diminishes your value. What adds value to you is you. You are the one who determines your worth and how others will treat you. You do play a role in how others will perceive you. When you don’t love yourself, this is when you mistakenly believe that you are not worthy of genuine love, of kindness and respect. Because you can’t see your own value, you hinder others from seeing your value as well.

Not loving yourself can lead to feelings of depression, unworthiness, anxiety, among other things. Life is not about this. You were designed to feel loved, to be loved, to feel happiness, to live in your knowing of your value and to grow into a healthy, fulfilled individual. However, none of this can be accomplished without loving yourself.

As you can read, not loving yourself is very expensive and not worth paying that big of a price. Anything that contributes to you not loving yourself, please get rid of it. Anything that doesn’t make you feel loved, appreciated and accepted are not worth your time nor energy. Start placing more value in yourself. Start seeing your beauty. Start seeing what makes you unique and wonderful and you will be at the start of loving yourself and if you do already, you will be loving yourself even more.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez. I now have a YouTube channel which I will ask that you subscribe for more tips to increase your well-being https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLZANKeRUFM4YvMXy4HzQrg.

 

The Grass Is Never Greener On the Other Side

I think as human beings it’s only normal to think that perhaps others have it better than us, that perhaps we can find someone better than the one we are currently seeing, etc. This kind of thinking although it may be natural to feel, it can prevent you from seeing all the good that is front of you. It is because of this that I would like to encourage you to see that the grass is never greener on the other side.

Don’t wait until something is lost for you to start valuing it. Remember that you currently have things that others would like to have. That may be the job that you have someone else may want. That can also be the relationship that you are currently in someone else would like to have a relationship like yours. Perhaps even a physical quality of yours someone else may want to have. Whatever it is, remember that you have something that someone else may want.

Also, your grass is as green as you make it. Perhaps other people’s grass looks greener because they are taking care of their own grass. So with this said, start taking care of what you currently have. Whatever it is that you see others have, why don’t you try your best to have that as well but just in a way that it’s unique to you. Start taking the steps necessary so that you can have the things that you want, the life that you want, the relationships that you want, the job that you want, etc.

I would like to encourage you to start seeing the wonderful things that you have in your life. Ask yourself: What can I be grateful for today? What do I have that is just great? What are some things about myself that are amazing? How can I improve the relationship I’m currently in? What are the aspects of this relationship that I love? What are some things that make my job great?

Asking yourself these questions will get your brain thinking and moving toward a more positive direction. Remember that your grass will be as green as you make it to be. Do your best to tend to your grass. Take care of it in every season so that it can look its best. Remember that in every aspect of your life, what you put in is what you get out. If you want your life to be as great as you want it to be, that is up to you to do the work that it takes. You have the power to make your grass as green as you want it to be and remember that just because other people’s grass is very green, doesn’t mean that it is greater and better than yours.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

 

You Are the Fashion!

I am impressed to see what is in fashion when it comes to image. It seems as if we are taught to accept things that are not a part of us. I was impressed to learn that freckles are now in fashion, so much so that people are willing to paint freckles on themselves. I have freckles on my face, not a lot, but some that are noticeable and I remember that as a young girl, I wasn’t happy about my freckles. Now I love them but back then no.

In today’s post, I would like to encourage you for your well-being to embrace the fact that you are the fashion. The way that you are created is exactly the way you are supposed to be and that no one, not even someone with so much influence, has the right to dictate to you what is hot and what is not. Remember that YOU are HOT just the way you are. It’s not the big butt, the small butt, the tone butt, the straight hair, the curly hair, the long hair, the short hair, the one with freckles, none of this is in fashion. Whatever you are, however way you are, YOU ARE IN FASHION.

Why drill this in your mind? Because it is important to have self-acceptance. Self-acceptance is key to great well-being. It is a must to feel great just the way you are. It is important to see how sexy you are no matter how you look. It is important to know your value as a person. It is important to know that you are beautiful just the way you are.

It is also important to ignore the outside messages when it comes to the way you look. Society may say that because your hair is a certain way, because your body looks a certain way, you are not acceptable or good enough. You may be in an environment where people don’t look like you or act like you so you feel like an odd ball. All this can cause havoc on your self-esteem and self-concept that can affect your well-being. Please know that you are the way you are, you have the tastes that you have, you look the way you do for a beautiful reason and purpose. You are wonderful just the way you are. You are handsome/gorgeous just the way you are. You don’t need to be a certain height, a certain weight, a certain nothing to be great. You are ENOUGH just the way you are!

Please remember that YOU ARE THE FASHION. YOU ARE IN FASHION and will ALWAYS be in fashion. It’s important to remember your value and not listen to outside voices nor other people’s opinion of what is right and what is not. Your well-being depends on this.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

You Are Where You Are Because That’s Where You Want to Be

Today’s post may be a hard one to digest for many. I know it has been and sometimes still is for me. Today’s post is about how you are where you are because that’s where you want to be.

Why can this be a hard one to digest for many? Because many times it is hard to admit that the reason why we are where we are in life is because that’s where we chose to be. “But Aura, this life that I’m currently living is not what I chose for myself?! All these things just happened to me!” Well, some situations may have occurred but in order for your life to change, in order for you to increase in well-being, it is a must to take responsibility for your life. Just like I’ve mentioned in my speeches, not doing so is like sitting on the passenger seat watching your whole life go by while allowing something or someone else to determine how your life will be. This is why in the book, Creating a Lifetime of Wellness, I encourage readers to take responsibility of their life.

Think about this for a moment, you are making choices every single day. Whether you like your choices or not is a different story but you indeed are making choices that all either add or delete from your well-being. The relationships that you have or the lack of relationships….your choice. The job or career you have…your choice. Your health…your choice. And even if you are predisposed to certain illnesses, and this will be another topic because I do believe that we are not our genes, it is your choice to decide how you will be health-wise. Everything is a choice!

So if you find yourself in a relationship you are not happy with, you are where you are because that’s where you want to be. If you find yourself that you are not happy with your health, remember that you have a choice as to what to do with your health and you can decide if you want to be healthy or not. Believe it or not, most of the things that you have and where you are, you are where you are because that’s exactly where you want to be.

If for whatever reason you are not happy where you are at the moment, then you seriously need to question why you are not happy. What needs to happen in order for things to be different? What can you do now to change your current situation? What actions do you need to take in order for things to flow the way you want them to flow? What do you want out of life?

Remember that you are the one in control of your life and of what you have. You have what you have because that’s what you want to have. You are where you are because that’s where you want to be. Complaining doesn’t serve unless if it is just to let out of your chest what you feel but this doesn’t change anything. What changes things is taking action. So if you want and need things to be different, then you must take action.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.