Believe In Your Inner Reality

I feel so compelled to write about this in today’s blog because I am believing more and more that there are two kinds of realities in life- the outer reality and the inner reality. The conversations that I have had in these past days have been so enlightening for me and has proved to me that indeed there are two realities in life and that if we want to grow in well-being, we NEED to believe in our own inner reality and indeed ignore the outer reality.

We are indeed tempted to believe in our outer reality. We are tempted to believe that there is bad out there, that we can’t trust anyone, that love doesn’t exist anymore, that the older we get the more tired or sick we get. We are tempted to believe that the life we want, the house we want, the person that we want to be doesn’t exist. I’m here to tell you that all this are lies. Lies to hurt us. Lies to keep us down. Lies to shrink us. Lies to keep us from growing into all that we are capable and meant to be.

The moment we believe in these lies, the moment that we give into these lies is when those lies become a reality. Part of life is disappointments. Part of life is rejection. Part of life is hurt and thank god for all this! Why thank god? You probably think I’m nuts for this but the reason why you want to be thankful for all this is because all these things will lead you to growth. It leads you to knowing and understanding what you don’t want that will eventually lead you to the things that you do want.

Your inner reality is the one with the most power. It is the one that whether you realize or not, it dictates the actions that you take. How so? Whatever you think, you will subconsciously behave in ways that matches that what you think. Whatever you feel, you will subconsciously be lead to take actions that matches what you feel. Notice that when you feel sad, you feel like doing nothing, you feel like eating junk food, you most likely will have conversations that make you feel more down. All these things will just feed the emotion that you already feel, making it more intense and imprinting in your brain the reality that sadness is your reality. Notice that when you feel good, you start doing things that make you feel good. You feel like eating healthy. You naturally feel more energized which makes you radiate unto the eyes of others. All this with something as simple as feeling good. That’s how powerful our emotions are.

If you have the courage to believe in your inner reality, you will see that you already are and have all the things that you want. The reason why it isn’t a reality yet is because you may have some resistance to it and you don’t fully believe in the things you want. I have to admit, the biggest challenge is believing in your inner reality when the outer reality doesn’t seem to match. Regardless, it is CRUCIAL that you ignore your outer reality. Your current outer reality is a reflection of who you were in the past. You are experiencing the residual of your past. So your present is your past. I never fully understood this until I am now fully understanding its meaning.

Believe that you are that person that you know in your heart that you are. Believe you are a healthy person. Believe you have that house that you want. Believe you have that marriage that you want. You have to believe and stay away from conversations that contradict that inner reality. Stay away from people who have a negative undertone energy. Stay away from those who don’t believe in your dreams. Stay away from thoughts that make you sad. For the sake of this blog post, I will discuss in the next blog post how can you start to believe in your inner reality when your outer reality shows its opposite.

In the meantime, I would like to encourage you to believe. Start listening to music that uplifts you. Do things that make you feel good. Be around loving people. Know that you are love and that you are loved. Let’s start with that first and then on the next blog post, I can discuss how to believe in your inner reality. If you first start by feeling good, you will grow in well-being tremendously.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez. I now have a YouTube channel which I will ask that you subscribe for more tips to increase your well-being https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCLZANKeRUFM4YvMXy4HzQrg.

 

 

Advertisements

What Do Loving Behaviors Look Like?

In today’s post, I want to discuss something that is very much needed because whether we realize it or not, the behaviors that others have toward us and the treatment that we allow from others can affect our well-being in a very indirect way. So in today’s post, I would like to discuss what are some behaviors and treatments that you NEED to allow because these are loving behaviors- the ONLY behaviors that you need to allow.

There are many ways in which someone can mistreat us that goes beyond verbal, physical, mental and emotional abuse. It is the following behaviors that you need to be aware of and mindful because it is the “small” things that are not so small which can eat up and chip away your self-esteem without you even realizing it. Mistreatment can come in the form of disrespect of space, self, time and keeping things in a superficial level. The problem with the last thing I wrote, “keeping things in a superficial level” is that this doesn’t allow for a deeper, more meaningful bond which is what provides nutrients to our soul.

So now that I wrote some of the things that are forms of mistreatment, I would like to write about its opposite. Loving behaviors from others come in the form of being respectful of who you are. What I mean with this is that the person doesn’t judge you for being who you are. The person truly accepts you for who you are. The person sees your value as a human being and treats you like so. The person makes you feel comfortable and good about who you are. Being around that person feels like a very nutritious meal that feels satisfying and healthy. It is with those kinds of people that you should be cultivating relationships with.

Loving behaviors from others come in the form of them respecting your time. People that want to be in your life don’t ask to be in your life, they just are. These are people that make the time to be with you and spend time with you. When they do spend time with you, you are not their plan B, you are their plan A. These are people that when they say they will contact you to see you, they do so. These are not people that keep you hanging, on the contrary, they want to make sure that you have set the time aside to be with them. They are mindful of your time to leave you hanging and not let you know of your plans together.

Loving behaviors from others come in the form of respecting your space. They respect the fact that you need time for you. You need time to cultivate you. You need your space to center yourself and for you to be right with you. They respect the fact that you have your own ways and that those ways are to be respected. For instance, perhaps in the morning you are not much of a talker because you need time to wake up. The person respects that about you that they are not just thinking about how they function that they invade that space of yours of you needed some time to wake up a bit. This is just an example to illustrate what I mean with space and this is just one form of space. Space can be defined in other ways as well.

For the purpose of this blog, I will break down this topic into different blog posts just so I don’t make this blog post very long. There are many ways to show loving behaviors that this in and of itself can become a chapter rather than a blog post. I just wanted to show you in a general sense what loving behaviors look like because these are the ONLY behaviors that we all need to be accepting from others. Accepting anything less than this only chips your self-esteem and self-concept, reducing you to believing that others can treat you however way they want and subconsciously placing you in the category of being an “option”. You are NOT an option, therefore, don’t ever reduce yourself to anyone treating you this way.

With today’s post, I want to encourage you to pay attention to the way others are treating you. How are you allowing others to treat you? If those in your personal space are not showing loving behaviors, it’s time to reconsider and do some spring cleaning of relationships in your life.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

 

You Are NOT Damaged Goods So Don’t Treat Yourself Like So

This post I want to dedicate it to anyone who has been badly bruised by someone, who has “made” them feel inadequate, wrong, or anything that is negative. My purpose with today’s post is for you not to allow anything or anyone make you become damaged goods because once you allow this, this is like catching the flu, only that it can take a really long time to heal.

How can we become damaged goods unintentionally? We can become damaged goods when we allow other people’s issues to become our issues. We can become damaged goods when we give so much to the point that we have nothing left for ourselves. This last thing can make us feel unworthy when those actions, we perceive, are not reciprocated. We can become damaged goods when we don’t learn from our past relationships and experiences. We can become damaged goods when carry negative feelings because of a perceived rejection. One thing I must say that the universe has lovingly taught me is that rejection is not a rejection, it is protection.

Others may do things that we may not understand why they do them. First and foremost, that is not your problem and it is not for you to try to figure out why they did it in the first place. Yes, analysis of a situation is a must so that we can grow. However, investing your time trying to figure out why someone did something when you did nothing wrong to them will only create issues for you that you have no business having in the first place.

Almost 99% of the time what others say and do is a direct reflection of the way they feel and think about themselves. This is because we only offer what we have inside and because we are the ones responsible for the way we decide to perceive and react toward a situation. No one else is but us. This means that you are not responsible for the way someone decides to speak or behave, so then this can help alleviate some of the pressure of trying so hard to impress or please others. Now, I would like to clarify that this does NOT give you permission to speak or treat others in a disrespectful manner because they “are responsible for the way they react to a situation”. At all times we have to be mindful of our actions and have compassion and empathy for others.

When you have done nothing wrong to someone who has done you wrong, you can have the peace of mind that from your end you are good. You have no regrets, nothing to worry about in terms of you hurting others. Therefore, don’t carry that hurt and anger with you. Those negative feelings that you carry as a result of someone else’s actions is only hurting you, not the other person.

You deserve to be in peace with what you do in life. You deserve to feel free to be yourself. You deserve to carry only the responsibility of your actions and your life. You will feel all this if you liberate yourself from the feelings that other people’s actions have caused. Remember that people reflect who they are inside, how they think and feel about themselves and their life. It is not your responsibility to change others but it is your responsibility to change yourself for the better.

As you can read, becoming damaged goods can be quite easy but it is up to us not to become damaged goods. I would like to encourage you with today’s post that if you haven’t done so, work through any issues that a situation, a relationship or the past has created in you. You are NOT damaged goods nor should you allow anything to make you become a damaged good.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

 

I decide to live….

In today’s blog post, I would like to encourage you to say to yourself “I decide to live”. Why? Because going through the motions of life is not living, it’s just existing and existing is the fastest way to death.

The reason why I write that it “is the fastest way to death” is because in essence your soul will feel dead. When you just go through the motions of life, not living with a purpose, you will slowly get to a point where you will question what you have been doing and was it all worth it.

So start declaring the following to yourself….

I decide to live despite the fact that I may get hurt. This is because rejection, hurt, disappointments are all part of life. They are part of my growth so that I can make better choices in the future. They all help me get clear as to what I want and need in different areas of my life. They all add up to the bigger picture of life.

I decide to live despite the fact that I may be afraid to make certain decisions. This is because living in fear will only paralyze me and put me further from the person I was always meant to be. I will take risks and I will take these risks because without them, I will remain wondering “what if” and the “what ifs” will only put me in a place full of regrets. I prefer to regret the chances that I took than the chances I never took in life.

I decide to live because when my time comes, I want to be in peace with the life I have lived. I want to be able to say I did everything that I always wanted to do. I want to know that I am leaving a legacy of strength, love and courage.

I decide to live….. saying these kinds of affirmations are necessary for your overall well-being because well-being requires risks. When I write “risks”, I’m not referring to risks that place you or your overall health in jeopardy; I’m referring to risks that you know would be healthy for you but that for some reason you are afraid to make because of a past experience, someone else’s experience, being afraid of the unknown, etc.

When you decide to live, you are making a commitment to yourself to be the best version of you. This is a promise that’s a must if you want to feel whole. This doesn’t mean that you won’t have moments of doubt or even regrets, but this will put you closer to having everything you ever wanted in life. So you decide whether you want to live or exist. I want to encourage you to decide to live because just existing is poison to the soul and that poison will catch up with you.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

 

Get a Good Understanding of Who You Are

I am more and more convinced that absolutely nothing can be obtained if you first don’t have a good understanding of who you are. Your overall well-being depends on it and that’s what today’s post will be about.

Understanding who you are is crucial because that is the foundation. Without this understanding, you can’t possibly know who are the right people for you, the right friends for you, the right companion for you, the right career path, anything. It is this deep understanding that leads to breakthroughs in life, that leads to you attracting what you want and need and that leads to a fulfilling life.

So how can you get a better understanding of yourself? You do this by spending time with yourself. That’s right! You need some alone time with just yourself and nothing else influencing you. It is this time spent alone that will help you sit still with yourself so that you can connect with your inner self. It is crucial that you connect with your inner self because it is the only way to access your path.

Pay attention to the way you feel. Your emotions are feedback from yourself. They guide you and let you know where you are in life, what to avoid or do less of, what works for you and what doesn’t, etc. How do you feel when you are around certain people? This is not something to ignore, you have to pay attention to this. This will guide you as to the kinds of people you want and need in your life. How does the idea of having something or doing something feels like? This too is to pay attention to because this clues you in as to what you should consider doing.

Look back at your childhood. What were the things that you were passionate about then? Kids certainly know how to live life because they are grounded and they live in the present moment. They enjoy life and care about being happy. What were some of the things that made you happy as a child? These things will clue you in as to what you need to be doing more of.

Pay attention to your frustrations. That’s right. Your frustrations are key to understanding the kind of life that you need. I wrote an article about it for The Ziet that you can read https://the-ziet.com/2015/12/05/use-frustration-to-gain-happiness-the-benefits-of-frustration-and-how-this-leads-to-happiness/ and this is the link for you to click. Frustration is something to be embraced because without this, you wouldn’t know what to do less of.

Understand what your needs are. I discuss this in my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve because this is one key to getting your life together. Without knowing what your needs are, how are you supposed to have the life that you want?! There is no way around it.

Not knowing who you are is detrimental to your overall well-being and leads to unnecessary hurt and disappointments. It leads to all this because you will attract things and people that sooner or later you realize they are not for you. You end up wondering what happened and a lot of times, what happened was not having a good understanding of who you are to know what you can handle, what you can tolerate, etc. So if you haven’t taken the time to get to know yourself better, please do so. It is for your greater well-being as well as those around you because if you are happy, you have more happiness to offer to others.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

Who You Are and How You Live Matters!

If at any moment in your life you felt that who you are and how your live your life doesn’t matter or if you know anyone who may feel this way, then this is the post to read. I am here today to encourage you to stop thinking that who you are doesn’t matter. I am here today to encourage you to stop thinking that how you live your life doesn’t matter because it does!

Whether you realize it or not, you impact others. I am pretty sure you have friends and family. Even if you don’t have much friends, you still impact those you do have. Everything we do and say set an example to others. There are people who look up to you and love you. There are people who are concern for you. And certainly the world needs you!

It doesn’t matter how you look nor how you are. It doesn’t matter what your tastes are. It doesn’t matter what you are good at and what you are not good at, all the things that make up who you are make you unique and you were created this way because someone else needs you exactly the way you are. How do they need you? It depends, people can need you in different ways. Perhaps you are meant to set an example for others. Perhaps you are meant to greatly influence others. Perhaps you are meant to inspire others. Whatever those reasons are, you are created with a purpose.

One thing I want to add is that you will be rejected by others. Why do I need to write this? Because rejection is one of the reasons why some may feel inadequate because none of us like rejection. However, if we can reframe that rejection into something else, we will see the beauty in that rejection. As a matter of fact, I want to encourage you to embrace rejection. That’s right! Gosh rejection is beautiful! You don’t want everything and anything that comes your way! It’s important to make room for more wonderful things and people in your life. This is why rejection is so beautiful- it makes room for better people and better opportunities!

When you are true to who you are and when you live your life fully according to the real you, you are actually giving others permission to do the same. That’s right! This is because it is so refreshing to be around people who are true to themselves and there is something about us living fully that resonates with others. That’s because all of us by nature crave to live fully and crave to be our true selves without caring about what others think nor feel. Living your life fully gives others freedom- the freedom to do the same and the freedom to not have to worry about you.

Since I wrote “the freedom to not have to worry about you”, I need to emphasize that not living your life fully and not being who you truly are, you are actually being a burden to others. That burden that you place on them without realizing will make others want to be away from you because indeed it is not freeing to be around someone who is negative towards themselves and not helping themselves.

I want to encourage you to know that who you are and how you live your life matters. Remember that it doesn’t matter who you are, what you do for a living, how many friends you have (it’s not the quantity that matters, it’s the quality), if you are currently single or married, etc., you do influence others. Your life has an impact on others that creates ripple effects. To not think this, I believe, is very selfish from your part because you are not considering how your actions nor who you are affect others and you are denying others of the gift of you.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

Overwhelmed: A Plague to Your Well-being

Feeling overwhelmed can be very disabling and it is precisely for this reason that I must discuss this on this blog.

Well-being is about joy, balance, harmony, good energy and loving life. Feeling overwhelmed takes away from all this and that’s when ailments can start. If you are feeling sick, tired most of the time, mentally clouded and a lack of purpose and joy, ask yourself if you’re feeling overwhelmed.

There are many reasons one can feel overwhelmed, one of them being having so much to do. I do want to emphasize that feeling overwhelmed is not equivalent to being busy. A good friend of mine, Dawn, brought up a very important distinction during one of our conversations and it is this- being busy isn’t equivalent to being productive. Why do I feel it is important to mention this? Because perhaps your feeling of overwhelm comes from being busy of not being productive.

When feeling overwhelmed, it is important to understand the cause. Is it all the responsibilities that you have that causes this feeling? If so, why? Is it that there are changes that you want to occur? If so, what are these changes? Is it a relationship that you currently have that makes you feel overwhelmed? If so, why is that?

Many times the feeling of overwhelm comes from some dissatisfaction that we currently have and are not aware of it. This is why I have stated over and over again that it is important to pay attention to your emotions. It is important to embrace them. They are feedback from your soul. By ignoring your emotions, you are ignoring important information from your true essence.

When feeling overwhelmed it is important to embrace it, sit with it and understand it. Once you take the time to understand it, you will know what steps to take in order to feel better.

So if you are currently feel overwhelmed, I want to encourage you to embrace it, sit with it and understand it. Don’t avoid feeling this way because otherwise you will be missing on important info that can lead to greater change and well-being.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.