You Are NOT Damaged Goods So Don’t Treat Yourself Like So

This post I want to dedicate it to anyone who has been badly bruised by someone, who has “made” them feel inadequate, wrong, or anything that is negative. My purpose with today’s post is for you not to allow anything or anyone make you become damaged goods because once you allow this, this is like catching the flu, only that it can take a really long time to heal.

How can we become damaged goods unintentionally? We can become damaged goods when we allow other people’s issues to become our issues. We can become damaged goods when we give so much to the point that we have nothing left for ourselves. This last thing can make us feel unworthy when those actions, we perceive, are not reciprocated. We can become damaged goods when we don’t learn from our past relationships and experiences. We can become damaged goods when carry negative feelings because of a perceived rejection. One thing I must say that the universe has lovingly taught me is that rejection is not a rejection, it is protection.

Others may do things that we may not understand why they do them. First and foremost, that is not your problem and it is not for you to try to figure out why they did it in the first place. Yes, analysis of a situation is a must so that we can grow. However, investing your time trying to figure out why someone did something when you did nothing wrong to them will only create issues for you that you have no business having in the first place.

Almost 99% of the time what others say and do is a direct reflection of the way they feel and think about themselves. This is because we only offer what we have inside and because we are the ones responsible for the way we decide to perceive and react toward a situation. No one else is but us. This means that you are not responsible for the way someone decides to speak or behave, so then this can help alleviate some of the pressure of trying so hard to impress or please others. Now, I would like to clarify that this does NOT give you permission to speak or treat others in a disrespectful manner because they “are responsible for the way they react to a situation”. At all times we have to be mindful of our actions and have compassion and empathy for others.

When you have done nothing wrong to someone who has done you wrong, you can have the peace of mind that from your end you are good. You have no regrets, nothing to worry about in terms of you hurting others. Therefore, don’t carry that hurt and anger with you. Those negative feelings that you carry as a result of someone else’s actions is only hurting you, not the other person.

You deserve to be in peace with what you do in life. You deserve to feel free to be yourself. You deserve to carry only the responsibility of your actions and your life. You will feel all this if you liberate yourself from the feelings that other people’s actions have caused. Remember that people reflect who they are inside, how they think and feel about themselves and their life. It is not your responsibility to change others but it is your responsibility to change yourself for the better.

As you can read, becoming damaged goods can be quite easy but it is up to us not to become damaged goods. I would like to encourage you with today’s post that if you haven’t done so, work through any issues that a situation, a relationship or the past has created in you. You are NOT damaged goods nor should you allow anything to make you become a damaged good.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

 

Honesty Is Truly the Best Policy

Probably as you read this title, you thought about being honest with others. Even though it is important to be honest with others, this is not the honesty that I am referring to. There is one person that is very important in your life; one person who truly has so much power in your life, one person whom you ALWAYS need to be honest with so that you can be guided to the things and people that you want and that person is YOU.

Yes, the first person that you must be honest with is yourself. Honesty is truly the best policy and it only hurts you to not be honest with your own self. How does not being honest with yourself hurts you? The lack of honesty toward yourself hurts your chances of ever being happy. This is because you will most likely do things that doesn’t come from your true essence which is your soul. Most likely you will do things to please others. Most likely you will seek approval from others. This lack of honesty can prevent you from even listening to your own intuition. This, then, leads you to situations and people that you can’t help but wonder “how did this ever happen?”.

Lack of honesty toward yourself leads you to being confused and lost. This is because if you are not truly honest with yourself, how do you know what you need out of things and people? How do you know what will truly make you happy? How do you know what truly works for you and what doesn’t? What honesty does is that it leads you to the root of things that help you get what you want out of life.

Lack of honesty makes you numb to your own inner truth. How are you supposed to know who you are if you can’t be honest with yourself? Even though there are universal truths, I believe that each of us have our own truth according to our true essence. This truth may not resonate with those around you or even your own environment but how are you supposed to know that when you are not honest with yourself? Honesty sheds light to any darkness that you may be experiencing in your life.

Lack of honesty ruins your chances of ever having the life that you want in every regards. This is because that lack of honesty prevents you from having a deep understanding of who you are. Perhaps you are doing things just because everyone else around you are doing it, but is it really what you want to do? Perhaps you have been so used to eating a certain way because that’s how you grew up eating, but is that way of eating working for you? Perhaps the career that you have doesn’t bring joy to you, so why is it that you are in that profession? Once again, honesty sheds light where there is darkness. If you are in the dark of who you really are, this will hurt your well-being tremendously.

So with this post, I want to encourage you to be honest with yourself as to the decisions that you make, the things that you allow in your life and even the things that you got rid of in your life. Be honest with yourself as to the things that you really want. Be honest with yourself as to how you really want to feel…..because honesty is truly the best policy.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

 

Get a Good Understanding of Who You Are

I am more and more convinced that absolutely nothing can be obtained if you first don’t have a good understanding of who you are. Your overall well-being depends on it and that’s what today’s post will be about.

Understanding who you are is crucial because that is the foundation. Without this understanding, you can’t possibly know who are the right people for you, the right friends for you, the right companion for you, the right career path, anything. It is this deep understanding that leads to breakthroughs in life, that leads to you attracting what you want and need and that leads to a fulfilling life.

So how can you get a better understanding of yourself? You do this by spending time with yourself. That’s right! You need some alone time with just yourself and nothing else influencing you. It is this time spent alone that will help you sit still with yourself so that you can connect with your inner self. It is crucial that you connect with your inner self because it is the only way to access your path.

Pay attention to the way you feel. Your emotions are feedback from yourself. They guide you and let you know where you are in life, what to avoid or do less of, what works for you and what doesn’t, etc. How do you feel when you are around certain people? This is not something to ignore, you have to pay attention to this. This will guide you as to the kinds of people you want and need in your life. How does the idea of having something or doing something feels like? This too is to pay attention to because this clues you in as to what you should consider doing.

Look back at your childhood. What were the things that you were passionate about then? Kids certainly know how to live life because they are grounded and they live in the present moment. They enjoy life and care about being happy. What were some of the things that made you happy as a child? These things will clue you in as to what you need to be doing more of.

Pay attention to your frustrations. That’s right. Your frustrations are key to understanding the kind of life that you need. I wrote an article about it for The Ziet that you can read https://the-ziet.com/2015/12/05/use-frustration-to-gain-happiness-the-benefits-of-frustration-and-how-this-leads-to-happiness/ and this is the link for you to click. Frustration is something to be embraced because without this, you wouldn’t know what to do less of.

Understand what your needs are. I discuss this in my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve because this is one key to getting your life together. Without knowing what your needs are, how are you supposed to have the life that you want?! There is no way around it.

Not knowing who you are is detrimental to your overall well-being and leads to unnecessary hurt and disappointments. It leads to all this because you will attract things and people that sooner or later you realize they are not for you. You end up wondering what happened and a lot of times, what happened was not having a good understanding of who you are to know what you can handle, what you can tolerate, etc. So if you haven’t taken the time to get to know yourself better, please do so. It is for your greater well-being as well as those around you because if you are happy, you have more happiness to offer to others.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

Become an Asset

On today’s post, I would like to encourage you to do one thing that if you don’t get anything else from this blog, this is one thing that you must do that can dramatically change every area of your life and that is to become an asset.

That’s right! For so many of us it is easy to blame other things, people or situations for our shortcomings, our “failures” whether that be in relationships, money, etc. However, none of this helps. All this does is continue the cycle of misery, frustration and dissatisfaction. I find that the best way to overcome shortcomings, misery, frustration and attracting the wrong things over and over again is by becoming an asset.

Become an asset by working on every area of your life. This means that you work on becoming a better self in every way you can- mentally, emotionally, spiritually and physically. So how can you start becoming an asset and in what areas am I referring to?

Become an asset to your family! Everything starts at home. Ensuring that you become the best mother, father, brother, sister, cousin, etc. will help create a very healthy home. This means that you work on being the best version of yourself because you understand that you are a role model for other family members. So make sure you are a good role model to yourself first so you can be a great role model to others.

Become an asset to your husband/wife or companion! You do this by making sure you are in harmony with yourself because you can only offer what you have. This means that you work on any issue you may have, so if you have any hurt or if you are broken, you work towards becoming whole. What constitutes healthy relationships are two whole people. If you realize that you need professional help in order to heal, then go seek that help. You are worth the investment.

Become an asset at work! Always do your best to acquire new skills so that you can have more to add to the work that you do. Do your best to always be grateful for the job that you have. Always strive to be a great coworker for your fellow work colleagues.

Become an asset for your friends! Do this by always striving to make yourself happy so you have more joy to offer to your friends. Always take care of yourself so that you can be that example to your friends. Always strive to be grateful for all you have as a person.

Become an asset to yourself! Yes, you read right. You have to be an asset to yourself. You do this by taking care of your whole body. This means taking care of your mindset, of your spirit and your physical body. This means stating positive affirmations to yourself, doing things that you love, being more loving towards yourself and always striving for happiness. This also means taking yourself away from situations that don’t serve you. This last thing I wrote is a form of love because you don’t allow yourself to be in situations that are harmful to you.

Becoming an asset is about making the effort and taking responsibility for your life. This is crucial to your overall well-being. It all starts with a decision so make a decision to choose yourself first and become an asset.

If you love the blog, you will most certainly love my latest book Creating a Lifetime of Wellness: Start Having the Life You Deserve where I discuss topics that highly impact your well-being that perhaps you may not be aware of. You can purchase your copy on Amazon https://www.amazon.com/Creating-Lifetime-Wellness-Aura-Martinez/dp/1458220885/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1490999433&sr=8-1&keywords=creating+a+lifetime+of+wellness or on Barnes and Noble http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/creating-a-lifetime-of-wellness-aura-e-martinez/1126001153?ean=9781458220882.

You can also read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

Are You a Liability to Yourself?

Many times we don’t have the life that we want, we don’t feel as great as we are capable of feeling and we don’t reach our fullest potential not because we are not deserving of all the things that we want but because we are our own liability.

The meaning of liability is something that can cause a disadvantage. So with this said, when you are your own liability, you put yourself in a disadvantage in the sense that you yourself cause your own misfortunes, your own failures, your disappointments, etc.

You are probably wondering “how so?”. Well, there are many ways to be your own liability. You can do this through your own beliefs. If you deep down inside don’t believe you are worthy, don’t think you are enough, don’t think that you are capable, these beliefs hinder you of the very thing that you want. This is something to be dealt with ASAP since not dealing with one’s own beliefs can keep recreating what it is that you don’t want.

You do this through your thoughts, whether these are thoughts about yourself or thoughts about your life. This can kind of be related to your beliefs but with thoughts, think about what it is that you think on a daily basis. Your thoughts do influence your emotions.

You can be your own liability by the things that you allow in your life. What kind of messages are you allowing in? What kind of relationships are you allowing in your life? What kind of environments are you choosing to be a part of? What kind of labels are you allowing? You can truly become what you allow.

What kind of shape are you emotionally? We are driven by our emotions. We make decisions based on our emotions. When emotionally we are not right, we won’t have the capacity to make decisions with clarity. When emotionally we are not right, we open the doors to bad things to come into our life.

When you come to the realization that you are your own liability, it is a must to get help. Sometimes it is hard to do this on our own and that is when it is a must to reach out to someone who can help. This is for your own good as well as the good of your own well-being.

You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

How To Get Energy When You Feel Emotionally Exhausted

There are times in your life when you feel physically exhausted but not because you have worked too hard or because you haven’t slept well, but because perhaps you are going through some either inner conflict or you are going through a rough time in your life that is robbing your energy emotionally. I think this kind of exhaustion is one of the worst kinds because if you are not careful, you can slip down and maybe even fall into depression. When feeling this way, how can you find the energy to keep going?

First thing I believe is to acknowledge what you are feeling. I believe that denying what you are feeling is not helpful nor conducive to truly moving forward. By denying what you are feeling it’s like trying to make believe that the wound that you have isn’t even there yet it is bleeding and needs your attention.

Try to understand where this feeling is coming from. Ask yourself what can you learn from what you are feeling. I believe there is always something to learn from everything whether it is good or bad. Every experience is a chance to become a better person and understanding where your hurt is coming from can provide important insight to you that can open up the opportunity for healing. The way to heal something is by understanding what is causing the pain/hurt.

Take things day by day, minute by minute. Just try to take one step at a time, put one foot in front of the other.

As hard as it may be to find the positive in even the most negative moments of life, it is a must to find the positive in everything. What focusing on the negative does is that it magnifies the bad things which then affects your emotions which will then affect your energy levels. Think about this, anything you dread to do, anything you don’t feel excited about doing will deplete your energy. By focusing on the positive, you are shifting your mindset which will then shift your energy- energy that you need to keep going even when the going gets tough.

It would be wonderful if there was an easy answer, a magic pill that would give us all the emotional energy we need when the going gets tough. The truth is that there is no such thing but there is one person who has the capacity to give you that emotional energy you need and that is YOU. With your acceptance of your feelings, with your own compassion towards yourself, with you doing your best to heal your wounds and see the positive in everything, you have the power to get the emotional energy that you need. I’ve said and written over and over again, well-being is something to work on everyday. It is something that you cultivate, nurture and create. It is YOU who have this power.

You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.

The Power of Authenticity

I think we live in a world where we are too concerned with pleasing others, with what others are going to think and with not being rude to others all at the cost of our well-being. Now, I want to clarify that I am not advocating total selfishness nor disregard towards others. Not at all and there is a fine line which we must pay attention. I can discuss that fine line on another post. What I am referring to in this post is the kind of concern where other people’s thoughts and feelings of you are more important than what you truly feel. There is no power in this kind of concern and this is why I am advocating authenticity.

There is power in authenticity. Let me start by describing what authenticity means. Being authentic means being true, it is not false nor is it imitating. So with this said, for the purpose of this post, it means being true to who you are regardless of what others may think or feel. It means you are not trying to be like others just to please others. It means you are not doing something that goes against what you truly feel and think even if others may not understand it and may be offended by it. I will explain what I mean with the latter “…even if others…may be offended by it”. What I mean with that is that there will be times where you will have to say “no” to others, set boundaries because what that person is doing you are not appreciate of, etc. You should never do something that goes against what you feel and think just because you might offend someone. Your well-being, your happiness, your peace of mind and you feeling good with the decisions that you make should ALWAYS go before you worrying about what others may think or feel when you notice that it crosses the line of your well-being.

I have to warn you that authenticity comes with a price. Sometimes a high price but I believe it’s a price worth paying because there is nothing like being authentic. The price is that you will have those who will misunderstand you, those who will criticize you, those who won’t want your friendship perhaps because of who you are, those who will talk wrongly about you behind your back because of your way of being. However, I think it is worse to go to bed feeling so disappointed with yourself for going against your true nature, for trying to fit into something that is so different from you and for trying to fit in or please others. At the end of the day, the reality is that you go to sleep to yourself, you wake up to yourself and when it’s your time to go, you will be in that coffin by yourself so who cares what others think?! You are the only one living your life, no one else is doing it for you! I know this sounds so blunt and crude but let’s be real. It is what YOU think and feel about yourself that matters most.

The power of authenticity is that you start to attract more of the people that you need in your life, people who are similar to you and who adds to your well-being. You will feel good with yourself knowing that you are doing things that makes YOU happy, not anyone else. You push away people and circumstances that in the long run don’t belong in your life. Your life will start to align itself in ways you never thought possible and this is all thanks to the power of authenticity.

Authenticity….so critical to your overall well-being because it is awful to do things that go against what we feel and think, your self-esteem gets chipped away every time you try to fit into something that you’re not and there is no way that your life can be the way you want and need it to be when you’re not authentic. Make it your goal to always be authentic to you no matter what.

You can read the blog on your Kindle by clicking on the Amazon Kindle store at https://www.amazon.com/Live-MaxTM-Viva-al-m%C3%A1ximoTM/dp/B00NK1JOJ4 and you can listen to my online radio show at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/AuraEMartinez.